Picard In Prison (Part Two)

I am now languishing in jail on Talan IV after being accused of murdering Divara, the Regent of the City.

CCTV footage clearly shows me doing the deed, though I remember I was in the holodeck alone at the time. As I result, I am now awaiting to be Disintegrated.

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The prison is someone reminiscent of mid-20th Century standard. I have one cellmate, a somewhat crazed individual by the name of Jody Carrot.



"You ain't some no-good copper are you?" he asks me aggressively, as I lie in my bunk.

"No." I reply, "I'm innocent, though, and was framed for murder."

Jody laughs.

"Yeah" he tells me, "We all were in here. Now lissen, and keep yer trap shut. We're going on the lam tonight from the Big House. Do you want in.?"

I think the Universal Translator might be malfuctioning. Eventually Carrot explains that he and a group of individuals are planning to break out from the prison, and I have the chance of joining in.

It's a tough choice; do I want to be a fugitive on the run, or do I want to be Disintegrated?

After half a second of tough deliberation, I tell Jody that I'm in.

-------------------

A few hours later, it is dark. We have our faces blackened and are ready to go. Jody gets his keys from the crooked guard and we sneak out with his accomplices. All of them of dubious looking, but at this moment, they are my only way out.

Whatever happened to cruising at Warp Speed in the Enterprise? How did I come to this?

We all advance outside, but the lights blaze on; it's all a trap.

The warder comes forward, with the crooked guard smiling behind him. Carrot delivers all manner of choice Talan expletives to both of them. The warder looks at me.

"Picard." he tells me, "As a result of your actions, your Disintegration will be bought forward to one hour from now.

-----------------

One hour later, I am brought to the Disintegration Chamber. It looks like it's curtains for me, as Jody would have said.

"The crew of your starship will be watching on their videoscreen, Picard." says the warder, "To show them we do not tolerate murder on Talan IV."

Not even a last request or meal. I was turned down when I asked for Earl Grey tea. Not too cheery here, are they?

I can imagine Bev must have run out of tissues up there, if she is watching all this.

"Activate the switch!" declares the Warder.

To be continued....I hope!

Picard In Prison (Part One)

The crew have been visiting Talan IV, an earth-like planet that still retains a lot of 20th century charm, yet it is advanced technologically.

It could always be a recipe for disaster, just like the ill-fated Vista experiment of the early 21st century. It took years to recover from that.

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We are all enjoying pleasantries with the local civic dictionaries when some official looking people, obviously law enforcement come in.

"What is the meaning of this?" says the Mayor, while swallowing a vol-au-vant and trying to chat up Seven, "Can't you see we are entertaining important visitors from the Federation?"

"I realise that." says the head man, "But we are here to arrest Captain Picard."

"On what charge?" I reply. I remember that I might have jaywalked across the road with Beverly earlier today. Perhaps they few it quite harshly here?

The leader gets out a document and reads it to me.

"Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the starship Enterprise. You are hearby arrested on the charge of murdering Divara, the Regent of the City. earlier today. After you have been found guilty, you will be placed in prison and and then Disintegrated."

That sums it up nicely. The 'innnocent until proven guilty' doesn't seem to apply, as he already had me marked as 'guilty'.

"'Disintegrated'" I ask him.

"Yes," he replied, "You will be placed in a chamber, and your molecules will be taken apart."

What a way to go!

As the head officer's minions put me in cuffs to take me away, Data protests. Riker joins in after finishing his Talan donut.

"There is nothing I can do, gentlemen." says the Mayor, "Talan law must be followed through."

------------------

Shortly after, I am in the courtroom, heavily handcuffed down and surrounded by guards. Beverly is weeping away in the public gallery. Data is acting for the defence.

"Captain Picard has not met the Regent of the City, your honour." he says to the judge, "What evidence is the that he has?"

"Roll the film" orders the prosecuting counsel.

The CCTV footage clearly shows me in broad daylight attacking Divara. I'm beginning to think I was guilty myself."

"Where were you when this was taking place, Captain?" Data whispers to me.

"I was on the Enterprise in the holodeck, Data...and no one was with me."

------------------

Shortly after, the judge announces his verdict, which is hardly a surprise.

"You will be put in a prison and shortly be Disintegrated."

As I am led away, I hear the sounds of increased weeping and wailing from the public gallery. Deanna and Jadzia have joined in with Beverly.

I manage to tell Data and Riker that they have to find the truth.

Things are looking precarious right now.

To be continued...

TWQ: What Did You Do?

This week, TWQ (The Weekend Question) asks you to remember what happened a week ago.

Can you mention three things that you did last weekend?

Here are my answers:

1: I wrote the 'Plant Problems' story for my Journal.

2: I downloaded the camera disc on to my new computer and experimented to see if it worked properly.

3: I made sure the first two hours of the new '24' season recorded properly while also watching 'Waking The Dead' at the same time.

Now it's over to you...

Plant Problems (Part Three)

Boothby has been causing some problems on his trip from Earth to Epsilon II. He was supposed to help us with the walking plants called Truffids that are starting to march against the inhabitants of the base that has been established there.

However, during the journey, Deanna and Riker have stopped talking to each over after a row they've had. When I've tried to find out the cause, all both of them have said is "Ask Boothby."

When I did, he just mentioned that he mistook Riker for Worf.

I think I can guess the rest.

------------------

However, we are now in Transporter Room One; fortunately, Riker and Deanna have kissed and made up, and they are going down with Data, Boothby, Beverly and myself.

We beam down to see a very green planet with beautiful fauna all around. Boothby looks in awe, as it's a paradise for any plant lover.

In the distance, we can see the base, newly set up; the doors are locked and the shutters are down. To the west, things look odd.

"It's like the ground is moving." says Deanna.

"Of course it is, missy" comments Boothby, "It's the Truffids closing in."



Slowly, the walking plants get nearer; we rush over to the ground between the base; as we do, we know we don't have miuch time.

"What do we do." asks Riker, "Destroy the plants or beam the inhabitants off?"

"We don't want to do either." I say, "The Truffids inhabit this world, and have a right to it. However, the scientists on the base want to observe the wonderment of nature."

Had it been James T Kirk who had this problem, he would have simply blasted the Truffids off the face of the planet with a couple of photon torpedoes. Things are so much more complex in the 24th Century.

"We can turn the base into an observatory by shielding it." suggests Data, "The Truffids will be unaware it is there."

"That's perfect, Mr Data." I reply, "But we need time to delay the Truffids while we construct the shield."



"I can help there, sonny." says Boothby, and he gets out his bag a few tiny globules.

"What are these?" asks Beverly.

"Plant repellant explosives, missy." he comments, "Just throw them at the ground before they get here and it will send them back for a while until you get the shield working."

We throw them and smoke risese as the Truffids approach; when it clears, we see they are all disoriented and starting to retreat.

"Well done, Mr Boothby." I tell him.

"It was nothing, sonny." he tells me.

A few hours later, the base is shielded, and the Truffids are walking about happily, none the wiser that they are being spied on by the scientists, and are likely to be the centre spread for 'Federation Gardener' next month.

-------------------------

As we approach Earth, in my Ready Room, Boothby is in angry consultation over the viewer with Admiral Costello.

"Look you young whippersnapper!" he says, "I was the gardener when you were just a pimply cadet. Couldn't you remember to get someone to look after the Gardens for a few days? What did you say? You have seniority? I know a lot more about you than you want to admit. I saw you with Monica Cartwright at the Christmas party. I'm sure you wouldn't want your wife to know about that....and another thing..."

I decide to walk on; there are some things one is just not meant to know.

Plant Problems (Part Two)

Guest Poster: Boothby

Now I'm on the Enterprise undertaking a dangerous mission to Epsilon II, I really rerally rarin' to go.

Some people just think I'm an old guy who looks after the gardens at Starfleet Academy. I tell you this, I'm sharper than all those Admirals and Cadets who think they know it all put together.

What was I saying?

Oh yes, don't interrupt me. It'll come to me.

Yes, these giant walking plants called Truffids have taken a dislike to the inhabitants of this new base that the Federation have set up on the planet, and are starting to march upon them.

The top brass wants me to sort it out; I'm the best one that knows about plant life.

They are right there.

--------------------

Picard welcomes me on board. A redheaded woman is standing next to him. She's obviously looking at him adoringly.

"This is Doctor Crusher" says Picard, "If you don't feel well, she'll help you."

"Listen, sonny." I say, "I'm not Old Father Time. I'm as fit as a fiddle."

"Of course you are." comments the redhead condescendingly, "But just in case you do, call the SickBay."

"Missy, is your name Beverly?" I ask her.

"Yes it is." she replies, "But how did you know?"

"I caught Picard writing 'I Luv Bev' on one of my trees the other week." I tell her, "He's done that before. I gave him a right piece of my my mind."

They both blush like a couple of teenagers. You'd think they would know better. Anyway, he won't be able to write that phrase on the Truffids. I can't see 'em taking too kindly to that!

----------

Once I get my things sorted out in my quarters I take a look around.

I come to a brunette who I met a while back in the Academy Gardens; she is holding hands with a bearded guy who is the Commander, judging by his stars.

"Hello Mr Boothby!" she says, "Do you remember me?"

"I sure do, missy" I reply, "You're err....umm.....Deanna."

"That's right." she says, "Glad to see you on the Enterprise."

"You must be Worf" I say to the bearded guy, "I remember Deanna telling me that she was seeing him and enjoying his company."

Deanna goes red and the bearded guy looks annoyed.

"Actually I'm Commander Will Riker." He informs me, "Worf and Deanna are no longer together."

The two march off; it sounds like there is an argument brewing between those two. I don't fancy Worf's chances.

--------------

A female Borg drone suddenly approaches me.

"You must be Boothby, the guest we have" she says, "I am Seven of Nine. I am studying human behaviour on behalf of the Borg Queen on this ship."

"In that case, we have a lot in common." I reply, "I find that when I tend the Academy Gardens, I see many forms of human behaviour; courtship, double-dealing and all manner of back-stabbing."

"Really?" comments Seven, "I must visit the Gardens sometime. The Queen will be most interested in what I observe."

----------------

My Com badge is activated.

"The Enterprise is approaching Epsilon II. Will Mr Boothby, Lieutenant Commander Data, Doctor Crusher, Counselor Troi, Commander Riker join Captain Picard in Transporter Room One in order to beam down."

Time to go and meet the Truffids.

I'd better take some plant spray.

To be continued....

Plant Problems (Part One)

I am summoned to Starfleet Headquarters by the Admirals.

It looks as if the Enterprise has drawn the short straw for another dangerous mission again. I don't know why it seems to be us. Any other starship just routinely cruises the galxy with bearly a scratch, while ours seems to get patched up and sent off again with alarming regularity.

I open the doors and Admirals Costello and Abbot are there.

I wonder if they know the 'Who's On First' comedy routine.

"Ah, Captain Picardo," says Costello, "Glad you could come."

"Thank you, sir." I reply, "Actually, it's Picard."

"Whatever." Abbot tells me, "That's not important right now. However something has come up on the fauna planet Epsilon II."

"Yes," continues Costello, "We set up a base for people to live there. Everythingthing was going well until the ecology started fighting back."

"Sorry, sir?" I say with a puzzled look."

"What my colleague is referring to," Abbot tells me, "Is that giant plants, named Truffids have started to threaten the inhabitants. They are hiding in their base. The Truffids are on the march. In a few days, they will reach the base."

"We don't want to destroy them." Costello takes up the talk, "We want to have peaceful relations with the Truffids."

First Contact with a plant; whatever next? A rose bush?

"I see, sir" I reply, "Lieutenant Commander Data should have an expert knowledge of fauna life, it should be a good..."

"That's not what we want, Captain." Abbot informs me, "We want you to take a human expert along; who we have in mind knows more about plant life than anyone else."

"Who's that?" I ask.

"Send him in." Costello informs a guard. The door opens.



It's Boothby, the Head Gardener of Starfleet Academy.

"Hello sonny." he tells me, "Let's get going on this mission. I'm already packed and ready to go."

"Admiral Costello." I say hastily, "Do you think it is safe for Mr Boothby to go on this mission? After all, he is a little frail."

"Are you trying to say I'm old, sonny." Boothby barks at me, "Let me tell you, I'm sharper than anybody else in this room."

He then looks at the Admirals.

Now make sure my Academy gardens are looked after while I'm away, or you'll have to answer to me."

"Let's go, Mr Boothby" I say with impending dread, and get ready to beam up with him.

To be continued...

TWQ: Live Concerts

This week, TWQ (The Weekend Question) looks at live concerts.

What are your three favourite live concerts that you've attended?

My answers are:

Judith Durham (Birmingham Symphony Hall). The former lead singer of The Seekers gave a stunning performance with many favourites and covers of classics from famous singers.

Nanci Griffith (Birmingham Symphony Hall). This singer really came into her own with many memorable songs.

Carmen (Covent Garden Opera House, London). This opera was not an individual performance, but a collective experience. Even if one is not an opera fan (I'm not), anyone would marvel at the sheer spectacle.

Now it's over to you...

Life With Kirk (Part Three)

It is highly dangerous been a redshirt crewman in the 23rd Century on Captain Kirk's Enterprise.

Since Q took me back there, to show me how tough things were, I've had to be very careful. When we investigated events on the desolate planet of Zargon III, a fellow crewman has been killed by a mysterious blood-sucking alien. Kirk has taken an Orion Slave Girl named Thada that we have found back to the Enterprise to show her what love is.

-------------





"A blood-sucking creature, Spock?" comments Doctor McCoy, "Maybe it's a taxman? Perhaps we ought to send you? The creature might not like green Vulcan blood!"

"That is not logical, Doctor." replies Spock, "Evidence suggest that the creature will feed on all sorts of blood."

"Oh, get a sense of humour transplant, Spock!" replies McCoy, "Don't suppress it all of the time!"

I wish I had Bev and Riker with me; at least they don't squabble all the time like these two.

We look in the cave where we found Thada; at the back, we see some alien skeletons that are near a fire.



"Fascinating." comments Spock.

"Stop saying 'fascinating', you pointy-eared Vulcan." McCoy tells him, "What does it all mean?"

"It means that Thada is the mysterious alien who killed Crewman Hunter and other visitors to this planet." states Spock.

"She could have special powers," I add, "Or be a shapeshifter."

We beam up hurriedly; Captain Kirk could be killed by that creature. As I know he is supposed to last until the inauguration of the Enterprise B some years from now. We can't have the timeline disturbed.

"Where is Captain Kirk?" we ask Scotty, who is at the transporter controls.

"He says is he showing that green girl around" he replies, "And her says that he canna be disturbed while he has coffee with her in his quarters."

"Unfortunately, we must do so to save the Captain." comments Spock, "Arm yourselvers everybody."

--------------

We reach the Captain's quarters; there is a lot of noise inside.

"Spock." says McCoy, "What if you're wrong and the Captain is just pursuing his usual interests?"

"It's a risk we have to take, Doctor." he replies, as he kicks the door down.

A huge monster is towering over Kirk; it has long claws and is covered in furm like a giant grizzly bear. Kirk'd shirt is torn, and there are scratches on his chest.

We all use our phaser, and the monster disappears into nothingness.

"I guess there are some women I don't get on with." laughs Kirk, "Spock, please inform Yeoman Janice Rand that she has been re-booked for tonight."

I suddenly see a blinding flash of light.

--------------------

I am back in my own quarters of the Enterprise D in the 24th Century with Q.

"Well, Jean-Luc." he asks, "Did you find it easy living in the 23rd Century?"

"Not really, Q." I reply, "I found it most enlightening, and it shows how far the Federation have come since then. Now just let me rest for the evening as I wanted to."

Q disappears at last; now I can take it easy for the night after that party.

The alarm clock goes off; it's morning already!

Aaagh!