Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Borg Queen Message To Seven Of Nine



Guest Poster: The Borg Queen

Hello Seven,

How are you? I trust you are keeping well on the USS Enterprise.

I must admit I've missed you here on the Unimatrix 01 Cube. You know you were always my favourite drone, despite the fact that the male drones did tend to drool over you. When it was Christmas time, you always tended to get more kisses under the mistletoe than I did.

Never mind; I'm losing track.

I'm sorry that The Strolling Drones won't be able to come and attend the Enterprise Party like they did last year. I'm sure Locutus would have wanted them to, and for drones to act as waiters. As I said, they are all booked for Varga VII for the planet's assimilation celebrations.

I understand Locutus has been in some bother recently; firstly going on robberies, then on trial. Fortunately everything is sorted out now. I had considered bringing him on board the Cube to find out what is going on. A little reassimilation might have sorted things.



Locutus doesn't know, but he won the Drone Of The Year Award when he was with us. Perhaps I ought to present him with it sometime? The trouble is, I can't see him appreciating it very well.

Now Seven, I need to ask you something. This is a serious matter. Have any drones been asking about a place called Unimatrix Zero? If they have, I need you to tell me. Don't get in a panic. This is just a little irritant I have to tidy up. It's a place we can't let drones go to, as it's wicked and subversive. I know you wouldn't be in something like that. We've got to get together and eliminate all the drones that go there.

Recently, we assimilated a couple of interior designers. They thought the state of the Cube was an absolute mess. Nothing matched, and the Feng Shui was hopeless. They are redecorating the Cube so that everything is just right, with colour coordination and design. If it all works out, I'll get them to do all the Cubes. If it looks a disaster, I'll have them disconnected.

I'll have to sign off for now, Seven. One of the drones need oiling.

Look after yourself,

The Borg Queen

30 comments:

Jaime said...

Feng Shui! LOL

Too funny!

DariDonovan said...

The Borg Queen scares me. She looks meaner than me! lol

Ellee said...

I agree about the Borg Queen. Hope those drones behave themselves.

The Curmudgeon said...

Unimatrix Zero again, eh?

And "Matrix" being the operative word, too.

This is an interesting direction --

And, switching gears, I for one will not miss the Strolling Drones one bit....

Gopher said...

What is that lovely power crazy queen up to I wonder....

Titania Starlight said...

Feng shui? Why, I never knew the Queen would care for such things. I am impressed.

Lavender said...

Interior decorators for the Cube ROFL!! "have them disconnected"..oh, if only that were an option for the rest of us too ;)

Barbara said...

Why shouldn't Seven go to unimatrix one?

Bob Johnson said...

The Drones rock, My fav tune, I can't give no assimilation, too cool!

Batman said...

The less Borg at the Christmas party the better.

Superman said...

Wow you guys plan the Christmas Party early!

Amanda said...

Interior designer borgs? I don't think thats such a good idea. I read that the season's colors are yellow and purple and I just can't see a cube looking like that.

The Mistress of the Dark said...

Drones doing interior design? Well if they work out..I'd like to borrow one.

Bilbo said...

I wonder if, when they're done with the cubes, the feng shui drones might take a look at my study. Right now it looks like a Borg cube from Fallujah.

Tim said...

To not be a jerk, I must delurk!
I have to say, I find the thought of borg interior designers very disconcerting. However, they would instantly be able to get their job estimates and ideas authorized via the communal mind, and be able to get straight to work without all that red tape!

Ellee said...

Maybe I should take a leaf out of the Queen Borg's book!

SQT said...

I hate it when the feng shui on my cube is messed up.

Ernie said...

The Borg Queen certainly makes assimilation sound apealling.

A Army Of (Cl)One said...

the problem with interior designers is that Cubes are out this year and "The Borg Trinagle" just sounds cheesy.

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Feng Shui & interior designs in Cubes do sound extraordinary. Still, the old colours are SO last season!

Dari, I'm sure you would never assimilate anyone.

Bilbo, perhaps the Borg can look at your study. The assimilation comes free.

Titania, the Queen likes to see her Cube looking it's best.

Amanda, yellow ans purple are the colours? Well the Cube WILL look different!

craziequeen said...

Feng Shui on a Borg Cube [rotflmao]
Are the Borg Spheres going to be done in co-ordinating colours?

I think Locutus looks dark and dangerous with that lovely grey skin...

:-)

cq

Jana said...

I hope you're going to post pictures when all the interior designing is done!

Michael Manning said...

"The Drone of the Year Award"! If only I had some to hand out to a few ex-girlfriends! :D!!!

Vegeta said...

Borg Interior decorate?

susan said...

Think I know which two interior designer drones you mean!

Neutral colours are still in, with a splash of the 1970s - you'll have to look it up on the computer. Then say, they had THAT wallpaper!

Lahdeedah said...

Ooh

the borg queen is my favorite guest poster!

Can I have some of those interior decorating drones?

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Everyone seems to want the interior designer drones to do their homes. Remember they do a free assimilation.

Susan, thank you for the colour guidance. The Cubes would look excellent following your advice.

Michael, that's a good one!

CQ, colour co-ordination would look rather good.

TX said...

If you need my help Seven just call me

Robin said...

Don't you wish those drones would just oil themselves?

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