Tuesday, September 26, 2006

The Reality Barrier (Part Two)

With the fabric of reality breaking down in the universe, and no sign of how to correct it, things are looking bleak.

"I sense great alarm." Deanna tells me.

That woman!

Bilko is talking with Lucy and Ricky Ricardo; apparently he is winning a considerable amount of money from a card trick he is showing them.

Another sudden flash of light and a man appears on the Bridge.

"This looks something special." he says, "It seems like I've got a sci-fi problem."

"Who are you?" I ask him.

"The name's Colonel Steve Austin" he replies, "Don't worry, I usually solve these problems in an hour; that's unless it's a two-parter, then I have two hours."

We all look puzzled.

"Be careful, Captain" says Worf, "Our sensors show that he has concealed implants; he may be an advanced form of Borg."

"That's all we need!" Riker exclaims.

Seven steps forward.

"You look interesting." she says with passion, "Do you have a message from the Borg Queen? I cannot seem to detect anything you are saying in the hive mind, however."

"Whoah!" shouts Austin, "What are you, metal girl? One of Rudy Wells' prototype rejects? Oscar never told me about you!"

Seven looks in disgust.

"The Barrier is still falling apart, Captain" says, "Another flash of light is iminent."

As it takes place, another man appears on the increasingly crowded Bridge.

He looks around swiftly.

"What's going on?" he says. Then he gets an early 21st century cell phone and starts talking into it.

"Chloe." he says desperately, "It looks like the Chinese have sent me on a brainwashing trip to make me seem as if I'm in the future....Chloe...are you there?"

I step forward.


"The name's Jack Bauer, and that's all you're going to get from me!" he replies.

Bauer then looks around, sees Worf, Lucy, Desi, Bilko and Austin.

"Just what is going on here?" he asks, "Surely none of this is real?"

I'm beginning to ask that myself; the screen shows the Barrier is steadily breaking up, and unless we can think of something drastic soon, the real world and the unreal world will melt together.

To be continued...


The Curmudgeon said...

I'm thinking... I'm thinking... but I can't see how you're going to get out of this one, Captain.

Osquer said...

Thank goodness that the reality shows have not started invading reality yet! The last person you want showing up is Simon Cowell!

Summer Dawn O'Ciardha said...

How awkward would it be if a Cartoon appeared? I would feel the urge to drop a safe on them. "Jus' for fun."

dddragon said...

Looks like we need a mysterious tv remote control to fix this!

Sleepless Mama said...

Singular hilarity, as always. (Also, thanks for taking a minute to check out my blog. I appreciate it.)

Jim McKee said...

Jack Bauer's on the scene! Sh*t's really gonna hit the fan now!

Professor Xavier said...

If you wake up next to Suzanne Pleshette and it turns out the whole Enterprise/Star Fleet/future thing was just a dream, I'm deleting my link to your site.

Darth Nepharia said...

LOL! Amen to that!

The Curmudgeon said...

professor xavier -- what do you have against Bob Newhart? That may have been the funniest moment -- ever -- in broadcast television history.

Melody Lam said...

HAHAH, Jack Bauer! Classic! Get Dr. House stat, I want to see him go against Bev. You absolutely need a doctor up there. Someone with the spirit of McCoy.

dragonflyfilly said...

whoa Nellie!...sounds like the Twilight Zone...don't these characters know that they are just that? --television characters that is, well, apparently not....

looking forward to the conclusion...IF there is one, hah hah!

Jen said...

I love it! Seven of Nine all over Steve Austin, you have quite an interesting mind.


M. C. Pearson said...

LOL, I loved the Six Million Dollar Man! Bionics rule! Too funny. Very, er, hip!

Ellee said...

I don't like the sound of the Chinese brainwashing, it's very worrying.

Merlyn Gabriel said...

woah, gripping .... almost as good as TV!!!!

I am waiting for the LOST cast to show up! Can never have too many heroes named jack!


Jean-Luc Picard said...

Osquer, if Cowell shows up, he will be right in the airlock!

Professor, don't worry, Suzanne won't be showing up.

Ellee, if you saw the last season of '24', you'll know where the Chinese brainwashing comes in.

Merlyn, the Enterprise found the crew of 'Lost' on a distant planet in an earlier post, but they did not want to be rescued.

Lahdeedah said...


Where's McGuyver?

Give him some chewing gum and he'll fix that reality barrier.

Suzanne said...

Barrier's are never good....especially the reality based ones.

Trinity13 said...

Ahhh, where is Wes when you need him?!

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