Thursday, April 12, 2007

Girls Night Out

Guest Poster: Jadzia Dax

With the Enterprise having an oil change at the moment, the girls have decided to go out for a night on the town. That's me, Beverly, Deanna, Ro, Jennifer, Trisha, Guinan and Seven.

We were a little reluctant to take Seven, but she insisted on coming.

"I demand to know what these female get-togethers achieve." she told me. "I insist that I come with you. If you do not take me, you will be assimilated."

Well, with a charming request like that, how could we turn it down?


The eight of us all look around and decide to go in The Klingon's Cave, a known drinking establishment in the nightly circuit. We all order some Klingon Bloodwine.

Seven drinks it back without a moment's hesitation.

"This is rather weak." she says to the barman T'Leth, "Do you not have anything stronger? Bring it to me, otherwise you will be assimilated."

T'Leth goes away issuing a few Klingon curse words.

"Seven!" warns Guinan, "You can't speak to Klingons like that; they are a little touchy, and don't like being insulted."

"Their thoughts are irrelevant!" she replies.

I sigh; it seems we might not last long in this establishment.

Ten minutes later, we are all thrown out and decide to look for somewhere else.

"I think The Thirsty Ferengi is just there." Beverly comments, "Let's go and drink the place dry. Seven, be careful what you say."

We order lots more drink, such as Romulan Ale and more Klingon Bloodwine. As the night goes one, everyone starts getting more relaxed.

"Let's talk about the men we have." says Jennifer, "It'll be fun."

We shriek, although things were starting to get foggy for me. The Dax symbiant was telling me not to have any more.

"My Geordi is a super guy!" laughs Trisha, "He knows all the latest hit tunes; he always tells me he wanted to be a disc jockey."

"Is that to do with horses?" asks Seven, who is looking very much the worse for wear, as the drinks are catching up with her.

We explain it all to her as Guinan answers.

"Oh, I've had a few men in the hundreds of years I've been going. Some pretty famous ones. Can't tell, though"

Lots of screams and "do tell!" comments follow, but Guinan maintains a discreet silence.

"How about you, Bev?" we all ask, "We know you and Captain Picard are sweet for each other. Are you going to get hitched someday."

"We maintain a professional relationship" replies Beverly in her usually diplomatic voice, but she adds with a knowing smile, "We have been on a few dates together."

More loud shrieks follow, which results in the Ferengi waiter coming over and telling us that there have have been complaints about the noise from other customers.

"Blow it out of your ears!!" shouts Ro.

This causes us to be ejected again, and we head for The Bajoran Beerkeller.

Once inside, we resume what we were talking about.

"My Worfie is a great big hunk of a Klingon." I tell them as I consume more alcohol.

"He certainly is!" agrees Deanna.

"What does that mean?" I reply.

"Well, we've both known him haven't we?"

Tempers start to rise.

"Calm down, Deanna and Jadzia" warns Guinan, "We're just on a fun night out. Now, Jenny, what do you like about Data?"

"Oh, he's a great guy!" answers Jennifer Baxter, "He's always so caring and kind."

"Do you ever switch him off if he bores you?" Ro asks.

We all laugh as Jenny says she's been tempted once or twice.

"I wish I could do that with Will." Deanna comments drily, as all the women agree.

"How about you, Ro?" I ask, "You haven't got a boyfriend have you. That Lieutentant Tyler has an eye for you. He looks cute."

Ro looks red faced as we decide to get matchmaking for her later on.

"What about Seven" Deanna comments, "She hasn't got a boyfriend either."

"Romance is irrelevant" replies Seven, "It is strictly forbidden by the Borg Queen on the cubes."
"You're not on a cube now, Seven." says Deanna, "You might like it."

"Any date I did not like would be assimilated." Seven states coldly.

"Well that's one way to end a romance!" Bev answers.

We all shriek hysterically; again we are ejected by one of the waiters and stagger to the beam up point to go back to the Enterprise.

I think there will be a lot in SickBay looking for a hangover cure.


Ellee said...

No wonder Guinan has such a lovely smile on her face, and a twinkle in her eye!

squirrel said...

Captain I can't believe you hadn't been nominated already! I just entered you as Best Blog Of All Time AND Best Humor AND The Blogitzer! Your site should be on there tomorrow sometime on all three catagories. After you see it get the badges to put on your site! Good luck you've got me, my husband and my son going to vote for you!

Mother Jones RN said...

I love girls night out. It's the best night of the week.

Party on!


Gopher said...

Girls out on the town now that is a dangerous place to be you never know what's going to happen and I'd make sure someone has a few pints of Klingon blood wine on hand just in case, hair of the dog and all that....

Kid Flash said...

What is better than a girls night out? Maybe Seven could find a guy with a fetish for being assimilated?

Professor Xavier said...

Sounds like those Borgs can't hold there liquor. I wonder how many drinks it would take to get her dancing up on the bar.

Anonymous said...

I think "Q" and "Seven" should link up...they can play at a cat and mouse sort of romance. I think it could work. She'd be forever trying to assimilate him, he'd be forever evading assimilation. It's a match made in heaven. Wouldn't you say Captain? No, I have NOT been drinking!!

susan said...

Oh Dangerous a girlie night out!

Linda said...

Let's hope Bev has a lot of IV fluids available in SickBay for those hangovers! If she was smart she got herself hooked up as soon as she got home so she'd be in shape to administer them to the rest of the girls later!

The Mistress of the Dark said...

Hmmm I can think of one guy Seven could assimilate for me :)

Miss Trashahassee said...

Uh, nobodder invited me an' I wanna know why


Miss T

Viamarie said...

Glad you had the chance to have an all girls night out. Your story reminded me of organizing one again soon.

Happy weekend!

craziequeen said...

I think Jean-Luc should let Guinan do another guest post - entitled 'Men I have known' :-)

Sounds like an excellent girly night out, Jadzia, and a good steep learning curve for Seven :-)


Barbara said...

I wonder if any of them will remember what they heard.

Seven was pretty popular on TNG, it had nothing to do with her personality though.

Lahdeedah said...


what do I need to do to get to hang on the enterprise?

I love girls' nights out!

Anonymous said...

Hehe! I love Seven. :D Sounds like she needs some work holding down the drinks.....

I wonder what those Klingon cursewords were. :D:D

I bet everyone looked pretty pathetic coming back in the Transporter Room. :D

Great post!

Nic said...

Hahahahahaha! That is truly a funny post. Actually kinda scary how accurate it is to earth woman when we get together over drinks to commiserate over the men we have or don't have. LOL!

Kelly said...

This night sounds oddly familiar. Was I there? Darn that Klingon Bloodwine!

Jaime H. said...

Sounds like fun!!

Titania Starlight said...

I also love girls night out. I wanna go! :o)

Happy Friday the 13th, Capt. Picard.

Jean-Luc Picard said...

The girls certainly liked their night out and talking about men!

CQ, I think it would be a very long post that Guinan wrote about the men she has known. A three parter, perhaps?

MOTD, as a reader of your blog, I know who you're referring to.

Squirrel, thanks so much for the nomination!

Ellee, you're right about Guinan!

WindWhisperer, Q and Seven would be a potent combination.

Nic, it's right that many Earth women behave like that!

PI said...

Am I missing something here? I thought you were a boy. Or do you enjoy women's company to the tune of seven?
Michele says Hi!

Ellee said...

I wonder if Jadzia is drinking from a £5,000 bottle of red that I wrote about yesterday? Hope it tastes good.

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

I'm with the Professor, how many drinks will it take to get Seven to dance on the bar?

eastcoastlife said...

wahahaha... what fun! Girls' night out!

I'm gonna vote for you.

Merlyn Gabriel said...

ooooh a girl's night out, that sounds like a lot of fun...


Jean-Luc Picard said...

Pi, in this episode, Jadzia Dax is the Guest Poster, as indicated, therefore we are seeing things from her point of view.

Jon, that's a good thought.

Eastcoastlife, thanks for that vote.

Miss Trashahassee said...

WEll, ain't nobody tol' me why I were not invited. Is it 'cause I'm a better cook than them other gals?



Miss T

Leon said...

Without the implants, Seven is kinda hot. Nice to hear what the ladies had to say about their other halves.

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