Halloween On The Enterprise

I am now approaching Holodeck 2; at the moment I'm wearing a doctor's outfit. Underneath is a 19th century suit.

"Computer, set holodeck programme "Frankenstein castle."

"Confirmed"

I enter, and the lightning and thunder are already in action. A huge wooden door is in front. I open it and enter Doctor Frankenstein's laboratory. There are boxes and switches all ready.

A giant table is in front, that can be elevated to the roof of the castle.

Music is distantly heard in the background:

I was working in the lab late one night
When my eyes beheld an eerie sight
For my monster from his slab began to rise
And suddenly to my surprise
He did the mash
He did the monster mash
The monster mash
It was a graveyard smash
He did the mash
It caught on in a flash
He did the mash
He did the monster mash

The door opens. A twisted little man comes in.

"There are a group of people here, master."

"Show them in, Ygor," I say.

Deanna walks in. She has a diaphanous white dress on, and her dark hair is up, as if she has had an electrical shock There is a streak of white running down both sides.

"You look a fine bride, Counselor" I tell her, "Where is the groom?"

"Right behind me, Captain, he's having a little difficulty wearing that outffit with those heavy shoes."

I hear a clump, clump, clump.

Riker comes in, wearing a square head, metal shoes, and struggling under a giant metal body. He also has a bolt out of both sides of his neck.

"I don't know why I agreed to this costume, Deanna" he complains, "It's hardly the sort I'd have. Maybe it would be better suited for Worf?"

"Will, you know the two of us are a couple" she whispers, "You want us to have matching costumes, don't you?"

"I don't have to lie on that thing do I, Captain?" asks Riker.

"Of course not, Number One...unless you want to see the view from the roof."

Data comes in with his friend Ensign Jennifer Baxter. She has an operatic dress on and her hair has long flowing curls. Data has a plush tuxedo, a wide rimmed hat, and has a mask over half his face.

"You both look excellent; the ideal Phantom and Christine". I encouragingly say to them.

Ensign Baxter holds on to Data and gives him a playful squeeze. He appears to look worried.

Worf comes in; his face is all covered in hairs. He looks annoyed.

"This Wolfman costume is hardly dignifying; if any fellow Klingon saw this, they would say I have no honour."

"Be careful you don't moult, Worf!" laughs Riker.

Deanna gives Worf a slight smile. He reciprocates.

Geordi enters; he has a flowing cape and a slight tooth problem.

"I am Dracula." he bows.

"Where is Doctor Crusher?" I ask.

"She'll be here in a moment" tells Geordi.

Beverly enters; she has a black wig on, thigh high boots, and the skimpiest black outfit I've seen.

"Greetings all" she annouces, "Elvira, Mistress of the Dark here to be with you."

I suddenly cough.

The ship suddenly jolts. Then the computer voice comes on.

"Warning, incoming vessel"

I talk with the lieutenant who is looking after things on the Bridge. He tells us the Varren, a highly aggressive race have cancelled out our shields and are preparing to board the Enterprise and take over the ship.

"What can we do?" screams Deanna, "They are going to wipe us out!"

I think I know. I tell the lieutenant to send the boarding aliens to Holodeck 2, where they can meet the Captain.

He says they agree.

"Quickly, Number One" I say to Riker, "Get on the table!"

The table elevates through to the castle roof; the thunder and lightning rages.

I am aware that the aliens have beamed in, but pretend not to take any notice, and pull lots of switches that flash on and off.

I tell Ygor to lower the table. As I examine it, Riker moves slightly.

"IT'S ALIVE!!!" I exclaim madly.

"What is this?" says the leader of the Varren, with a worried look on his face, as he sees the Wolfman, Elvira, Christine, the Phantom,Dr Frankenstein, the Monster, the bride, Ygor and Dracula.

"Welcome to my castle."

The quickly panic and beam out.

The lieutenant informs me they have departed at Warp 9 speed.

"Number One" I say to Riker, you may need to keep that outfit for future invasions."