I am summoned to Starfleet Headquarters by the Admirals.
It looks as if the Enterprise has drawn the short straw for another dangerous mission again. I don't know why it seems to be us. Any other starship just routinely cruises the galxy with bearly a scratch, while ours seems to get patched up and sent off again with alarming regularity.
I open the doors and Admirals Costello and Abbot are there.
I wonder if they know the 'Who's On First' comedy routine.
"Ah, Captain Picardo," says Costello, "Glad you could come."
"Thank you, sir." I reply, "Actually, it's Picard."
"Whatever." Abbot tells me, "That's not important right now. However something has come up on the fauna planet Epsilon II."
"Yes," continues Costello, "We set up a base for people to live there. Everythingthing was going well until the ecology started fighting back."
"Sorry, sir?" I say with a puzzled look."
"What my colleague is referring to," Abbot tells me, "Is that giant plants, named Truffids have started to threaten the inhabitants. They are hiding in their base. The Truffids are on the march. In a few days, they will reach the base."
"We don't want to destroy them." Costello takes up the talk, "We want to have peaceful relations with the Truffids."
First Contact with a plant; whatever next? A rose bush?
"I see, sir" I reply, "Lieutenant Commander Data should have an expert knowledge of fauna life, it should be a good..."
"That's not what we want, Captain." Abbot informs me, "We want you to take a human expert along; who we have in mind knows more about plant life than anyone else."
"Who's that?" I ask.
"Send him in." Costello informs a guard. The door opens.
It's Boothby, the Head Gardener of Starfleet Academy.
"Hello sonny." he tells me, "Let's get going on this mission. I'm already packed and ready to go."
"Admiral Costello." I say hastily, "Do you think it is safe for Mr Boothby to go on this mission? After all, he is a little frail."
"Are you trying to say I'm old, sonny." Boothby barks at me, "Let me tell you, I'm sharper than anybody else in this room."
He then looks at the Admirals.
Now make sure my Academy gardens are looked after while I'm away, or you'll have to answer to me."
"Let's go, Mr Boothby" I say with impending dread, and get ready to beam up with him.
To be continued...
22 comments:
That Boothby is sure crotchety. At least you don't have take Abott and Costello with you.
If they decide to give up on peaceful contact, give me a call. All I have to do is look at a plant and it dies.
I hope Boothby can handle Abbott and Costello. I wonder what the three of them will do with a plant.
Plants? I know how to make them go away. But you have to be a necromancer, and know how to control your magic to make a blight.
Better yet, you know what plants love? Fire. Give them lots of fire.
And Aphids. Aphids eat plants. So do vegetarians.
There you go Captain, your problem can be handled simple if these guys are as hostile as thought, become a necromancer, and light the plants on fire, and the cooked vegetables will be enjoyed by Aphids and Vegetarians.
Now, now Cpatain you'de better be nice to Boothby or you'll have to answer to the AARP. That is if he's American. Or maybe in your century they have the UARP. Universe Association of Retired Persons.
I wonder why the plants are rebelling... Maybe they need extra fertilizers? Not enough growing space?? Hmmm
Hah! Boothby could take on the entire Borg empire and kick their collective asses!!!
Don't want to be in the Admirals' shoes if the gardens at Starfleet run down.
Have fun with the truffids, are they cousins to the Triffids?
xxs and oos
merly
I was wondering if they were any relation to Tribbles... :)
I'd take along pruning shears if I were you Jean-Luc, "just in case"!
plants fighting back. I hope that never happens here or I'd be doomed.
I have every confidence in how you will cope with this, captain.
Hm, he sounds just a litte crotchety.
Summer Dawn, I don't think Boothby would take kindly to your anti-plant solutions.
Ciera, the pruning shears might be useful.
Merlyn, Boothby might well give the Borg a few problems.
Barbara, fortunately Abbot & Costello aren't coming along...I never liked their movies!
let me bite him then you wont have to worry
Actually I think you will be glad to have Boothby... I bet he will be alot better than Data...
I think he is my new hero
Isn’t taking a gardener to help with first contact of a plant species, like taking a barber along for chat with Wookies?
I am not sure this is such a good idea.
This looks like the makings of a really bad 1950's-era movie. Either that or a giant, delicious salad!
Hope gardener does justice to the plants.
Have a nice week!
hi capt. i grew a plant once. that's sadly all i know about here. smiles, bee
Like Ciera noted, or they any realtion to tribbles? If so they may be harmless but annoying. Better take some ear plugs if they start all that shrilling chattering. I can't wait to see what happens next!
Drats my errors!!!
That is suppose to be ..."Are they relation to the tribbles"?
Excuse my elmo fingers. :o)~
hmmmm, i like the gladiator's idea of a giant salad...
cheers for now,
pj
A salad might be a further optional end for the plants.
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