Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Restructuring (Part One)

I've just been called to my Ready Room for a personal video chat with Admiral Jensen, Chief of Starfleet Human Resources.

I don't know why they still call it that; a lot of Starfleet personnel aren't even human!

Never mind; I always get bad feelings when a one-to-one meeting is called for. It usually involves something unpleasant, for the Enterprise, for me or for both.

I put my code in, which the computer acknowledges; Jensen's face appears. he doesn't look happy and beaming.

Definately trouble ahead!

"Captain Picard" he says, "It looks like the Federation President has approved of a number of changes within Starfleet. He wants the system restructured."

"What does that mean, Admiral?" I ask, although I know enough executive double-speak to make a guess."

"Well, err..." he starts, not keen on saying much more, "The President would like to reassess the positions of the current Captains within Starfleet and see if they are suitable for their position."

"You mean us Captains have to apply for their own jobs, and if we don't measure up, we are fired?" I shout.

"I w-wouldn't p-put it as strongly as t-that." Jensen replies, sounding like Reg Barclay, "A Captain who wasn't quite suitable might find himself commanding a different vessel, or enjoying a well-earmed retirement."

"What sort of vessel were you intimating at, Admiral?" I ask him.

"A deep-space cargo ship would be one idea." Jensen tells me, although looking like he didn't have to.

I'm not keen on commanding a leaky old refuge ship on the edge of the Delta Quadrant; there's no other Federation ships around there.

"What would happen then to the ships who didn't have the Captains?" I ask.

"Well, err....Captain Picard." the Admiral goes on, "The likeliest scenario is that the senior officer, like the Commander would take over; then someone would take his position. Eventually the loss will be absorbed by the senior staff, hence the restructuring in the organisation."

It all becomes very clear; Starfleet is trying to cut down on it's staff.

"What do I do?" I ask him, although I would really like to hit Jensen on the nose.

"Report to Starfleet Headquarters for your job interview in two days, Captain." says the Admiral, "Jeansen out."

The screen goes blank, and I think about it all. Another job interview? I hate those. The one I had for the Enterprise Captaincy was torture enough. I thought most of the interviewers disliked me and would have preferred Boothby the gardener to have it rather than me.

I march out of the Ready Room; Riker is sitting in my Chair directing events on the Bridge.

"Off my Chair, Number One!" I call out, "You're not the Captain yet!"

To be continued....

16 comments:

Ellee said...

I'm really shocked, don't they appreciate quality when they see it! What a bad start to the year, but chin up Captain Picard, you must retain control.

TrueJerseyGirl said...

That damn HR and their restructuring. Don't worry Cap'n, it'll all work out.

Jen said...

You can always go back to the Borg, they seemed to find you suitable for a position in leadership...

;-)

They can't fire you, you know where all of the bodies are buried. Heads will roll all over the galaxy if you start letting cats out of bags.

Anonymous said...

Riker's been up to something besides eating donuts, I'll wager....

UngaMan said...

hmmm...can I offer for you a position as the CO of one of our Base's support ships?

We have an Akira and a Steamrunner that you may find suitable for a man with your experience :)

Gopher said...

Happy New Year Jean-Luc, damn HR people always thinking of ways to screw with your head...
I some how can't see the Re-assigning you to a cargo tug somewhere in the outer reachs of whereever where the nearest starfleet ship is days away at maximum warp.

Professor Xavier said...

Those ungrateful so and so's. Here you are, savior of the galaxy a dozen times over and they're making you prove your worthy for the job. Disgraceful.

Anonymous said...

hey captain! just popping in to say howdy. still know nothing about this ship but i love all ships so i like to visit.... smiles. bee

Lahdeedah said...

HR isn't so much human resourses as human refuse... no offense to any HR workers... I'm sure it's a difficult job. But seriously, has HR ever downsized itself?

You could find some small, underdeveloped world and captain a nice pirate ship. Better yet, go back in time and sail the ocean's blue... take a break from space.

Or um, just get it over with and toss Riker off your ship, maybe a small accident in the holodeck, I mean it's obviously his fault....

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

I'm with ladedah there. This is a blessing in disguise.

Ciera said...

I agree...what a rotten start to the new year! I can serve as a character witness if you'd like Jean-Luc :)

Anonymous said...

That's terrible! Good luck Captain!

Anonymous said...

You'll do just fine, Captain. Don't worry. And if things do get really bad, you can always have Wesley bail you out.

(ouch...even jokingly, that's not very funny...)

Jean-Luc Picard said...

It's great to have friends offering their support!

You really have some useful ideas there.

Jen, I like your suggestions, as I do Lahdeedah's.

Ciera, good to have you as a character witness.

Mykol said...

Them darn HR guys. You said to Riker "You're not the Captain yet!" an I say he won't be...unless you retire or if Riker gets his own ship.

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