Thursday, October 05, 2006

Halloween Preparations

The senior staff are having a meeting in my Ready Room, as the ship is not being invaded, or haven't entered an anomoly which we seem to find with unaccountable ease.

The subject for discussion: Halloween.

"Now then, everybody." I start, "As we are now into October, the end of the month is Halloween, and we want to make sure everybody has a good time. Any suggestions."

"What is Halloween?" asks Seven.

"Err, well, Seven" I reply, "We all dress up in scary outfits look ghoulish and try and frighten each other."

Seven looks very confused.

"That is very irrelevent" she says, "What does this achieve? Does it make the Enterprise run faster?"

"No" I tell her, "It's these sort of things that keep up morale on the ship."

"If morale goes down on a Cube, the drones are disconnected." she says seriously, although there is a slight giggle in the room from the others.

"We know one person who won't need to wear a scary costume." whispers Riker to Deanna. They laugh to each other.

"I do not feel scared on Halloween" says Data, "It is a human emotion that I do not possess."

"What do you see when you watch those scary movies Data?" asks Geordi.

"I see a lot of actors" he replies, "When that new movie came out last week, 'Saw CXXXVIII', I did jump a little though, as I assumed Jigsaw was dead."

"I think we are straying from the main point of the meeting." I tell them, "We need to sort out how we are going to celebrate Halloween."

"We can always adapt a holodeck to something creepy, like we did last year, when we created a castle" says Beverly.

"Why should a castle be considered fearful?" inquires Seven.

"Dracula, Frankenstein" answers Riker, "Haunted castles, howling wolves, vampires. Do you see, now, Seven?"

"All I see is why humans and others in the Federation are so weak" she replies, "They scare of simple creatures; it is little wonder that the Borg are supreme!"

"Seven" Deanna tells her, "People enjoy being scared; they like to see movies that have them terrified."

"You'll be a lot more terrified when I put you in the Assimilation Chamber, Betazoid!" comments Seven.

Oh dear; that subject always raises tempers. The staff start shouting at Seven, and she tells the that The Borg Queen will get them all.

"CALM DOWN!" I shout hoarsley. Everyone turns round and looks at me in surprise, including Seven.

"As you command, Locutus." says Seven quietly, then sits down, as they all do.

"Now then." I continue, "Let's all carry on. I think we just need to come in an outfit that suits the evening, together with food and drink."

"I agree" says Beverly, "We ought to keep the details of what we wear to ourselves."

"Yes, and the Captain can decide what setting the holodeck can be."

They all agree; even Seven.

"What will you tell The Borg Queen about Halloween, Seven?" I ask her as we all leave the Ready Room.

"That I have discovered another weakness in the human psyche." she replies arrogantly, before clanking off down the corridor.


The Curmudgeon said...

Halloween a weakness? Definitely.

My kids like horror movies. One evening, in my presence, two of them debated the relative merits of the "Saw" movies with those of some other buckets-o-blood franchise.

But I tell them, if they want to get scared, they should look in my checkbook. That always scares the heck out of me.

UngaMan said...

I think it is time for Data to turn on his emotion chip and experience some terrifying emotions...

I like Seven's idea: why not set the holodeck to play a Borg assimilation chamber?

::evil grin::

pads said...

I was going to suggest a borg cube, but then seven wouldn't be frightened would she grin.

theres no doubt what seven will come as though herself grin.

Lets see what would frighten seven you could try barnie the dinosaur it frightens me lol.

Love pads

Ellee said...

Is it just dressing up, or is there a trick for those who don't want to participate? I think my kids would tell you I look scary enough without an outfit. I hope you all have fun. It's a great excuse for a party.

Erifia Apoc said...

I have to agree with Seven here. This Halloween... It confuses and infuriates me.

Anonymous said...

okay this beta nonsense is driving me crazy, 2 times tried to post and got bounced into the netherworld.

anways. I hope the party is fun, forgot what I said last time I tried to post!

Trinity13 said...

Hmmm, someone could dress up as Wesley and it would prob scare you to death...wouldn't it Capt?!

Lahdeedah said...


It's been AGES since I've been to a good Halloween bash.


How many dress up as Borg? What a great night to assimilate people! All the Borg can pretend they are trick or treating!

But that's an American thing. Did trick or treating make it into the future?

Jean-Luc Picard said...

It's been ages since I went to a good Halloween party as well.

Dressing up as the Borg would be scary.

Trin, you're right in saying Wes is scarier!

Merlyn, I don't know what adbantage this Beta has. I just stick with what I know.

Pads, you're absolutely right!

Ungamon, I don't think Data would like being scared!

Ellee, that's mean of your children! It's a good chance to dress up. It always breaks the ice.

Anonymous said...

When my kids were little,they always called Worf,'Raisin Head'.Now that is scary

utenzi said...

I seem to note some cognitive dissonance between your feelings about Halloween and the Star Trek interpretation, Captain. What's up with that??! Maybe it's a British thing. ;-)

Michele sent me over to witness the Ready Room, Captain Picard.

Lahdeedah said...

Never heard of apple cobbler!

Egads... it's apple pie made lazily...

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Captain, I have a great costume idea for you. Get a wheelchair and a nice suit and you can dress as the leader of that one group of superhero misfits. You know, Chief from Doom Patrol.

Summer Dawn O'Ciardha said...

I love halloween. I dress up as a cheerleader, and walk around as a blonde bimbo... *Giggle*

And good one Jon, I was laughing.

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Sam, I don't think I would survive if I called Worf 'Raisen Head,'

Utenzi, I think Hslloween is frowned on a little in Britain; they don't all enjoy it as others do.

Jon, that's a great idea; what would the Professor say?

Summer; love your idea; are we going to see pictures?

Nic said...

So is this where Seven decides the scariest costume she can come up with is to look human? Cool!

I'm not a halloween fan really. I was when I was younger, but as I'm older, it celebrates the wrong things. Call me old fashioned. Besides, Em has much more fun at the Fall Festival at our church with moonwalks and games and a petting zoo and food, etc. Safer environment and you know what you're getting in the candy that's handed out.

Carmi said...

You have reminded me that I am way behind in my annual pumpkin photography efforts. Time for me to head out and capture some images of those lovely orange gourds before they end up smashed over the main road through our neighborhood.

Great to e-see you from Michele's again today! You're always a wonderful read.

moodymistress said...

Great blog. I absolutely love Star Trek and this was very fun to read.

Anonymous said...

Hello Capitaine!

Haloween, it is how?

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