Riker, Data and myself are traveling back to the Enterprise in a shuttle after one of those interminable conferences.
The downside of having a commanding role is attending these awful meetings.
Suddenly a buzzer is going loudly; whatever it is telling us, it's not telling us to have a nice day.
"There is a giant ion storm approaching; It is heading right for us, Captain." says Data in a voice that is close that he can get to panic without actually being so.
"Turn round Data!" shouts Riker, "Get out of here!"
It is too late, and the storm hits us, rocking the ship, with all sorts of electrical buzzes; like the sort one sees in the old 'Frankenstein' movies.
Why is it, in the vast emptiness of space, are we so easily able to pick up anomalies and ion storms? I'm beginning to think Starfleet vessels must have a kind of magnetism.
Eventually, the shuttle limps it's way to the Enterprise; it looks a little odd from where I am, as it is a pinky colour. There also appears to be a badge of a man lying unconscious, with a woman standing triumphant over him.
It must be my imagination after the effects of the ion storm.
I wake up in SickBay, along with Riker, Data is there, but he is looking concerned. A woman is tending to our minor injuries, which are healed.
"Where's Beverly?" I ask her.
The woman looks shocked, as if I have told her to go in the airlock and leave the ship.
"You can't talk about the Captain like that!" she say, "Don't you realise that..."
"Why are these men in Command uniforms?" shouts a voice as she enters.
She is dressed in an all-red outfit, an had four buttons on, indicating a Captain's rank.
"Beverly" I say, "What is going ..."
She looks disgusted, and slaps me hard across the face. It seems I can't finish my senteces around here.
"You will address me as Captain Howard" she tells me. I recall that 'Howard' was her maiden name before she married Jack Crusher. He was killed later on.
"I think something happened in the ion storm, Bev...I mean Captain Howard; this does not seem to be the place we intended to be. I'm Captain Jean-Luc Picard, and this is Commander Riker and Lieutenant Commander Data."
"The brig is where you will end up if you keep making outrageous claims like that." Beverly tells me, "You will put on the uniforms of an ensign, as that is the only role a man is allowed to have on this ship."
Deanna walks in; she is in a red uniform as well; the three pips tell me she is is the Commander of this vessel.
Riker looks relieved.
"Deanna!" he exclaims, "Strange things have been happening late..."
"You will address me as Commander Troi!" she orders him, and Riker receives the customary slap on the face, and is not able to finish his sentence.
"Give these three men Ensign uniforms" Beverly tells Deanna, "And give them some menial job that is suitable for them; something especially derogatory,"
"Yes, Captain Howard" Deanna replies, and takes us out.
With no slight exaggeration, it looks like we have a few problems.
To be continued....
I have been sent this Meme by Nic, so will now (attempt) to complete it:
3 smells that I love:
3 smells that I hate:
3 jobs that I have had in my life:
Helping my father when he was newsagent
Being a son
3 movies that I could watch over and over:
The Lord Of The Rings trilogy
The Godfather trilogy
3 fond memories:
Looking at the Great Pyramids of Giza
My first day at work
Standing on top of the Empire State Building
3 jobs I would love to have:
3 places I have lived:
3 things I like to do:
3 of my favorite foods:
Hamburger...the bigger the better!
3 places I would like to be right now:
On the Nile
Touring the USA
Meeting all my blogfriends
3 websites I visit daily:
(and many, many more!)
3 things that make me cry:
A weepy movie
The thought of anything bad happening to relatives and friends
Certain lyrics to songs that touch my heart and soul
3 friends that I am tagging:
I don't tag!