Ensign Britney Undercover (Part Six)

Guest Poster: Ensign Britney

Can things get much worse than they are right now?

Here I am, working undercover as a member of the Dregs of Society, a counterculture threatening to overthrow the Federation, and I've just been given a phaser disruptor to disintegrate the prisoner we have..my best friend and soulsistah, T'Pol.

If I don't do it, then I am going to be exposed as a Federation sympathiser, and I'll be next for the disruptor.

I must admit, I did have some sympathies for the Dreg lifestyle, as I'm no fan of authority myself. To be generous, Captain Picard has always makes sure I have the same brig when I am sent there, to make me feel at home.

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"Do it!" shouts Desdemona, leader of the Dregs, "Once we get this Federation snooper out of the way, we'll go and break my brother out of the penal colony."

An idea occurs to me, like it did when T'Pol and I didn't have enough money for the entrance fee to the Disco AGoGo Nightclub.

"Give me another disruptor, Desdemona." I command, "I want to finish her off in style!"

"Very impressive, Britney." comments Desdemona, "You have true Dreg authority."

I aim both guns at T'Pol, who looks horrified.

Carefully, I set one gun at a low setting and aim for her handcuffs. The disruptor shatters them.

I throw the other disruptor at T'Pol.



"Come on, sistah!" I shout, "Let's put this group away!"

"Britney!" exclaims Desdemona, "You're one of the Federation! You traitor!"

The door bursts open, and Worf, his security team and the senior staff enters, as we point our disruptors at the Dregs, keeping them at bay in the corner.

"It seems that our presence was not required, Captain." Data declares.

"Indeed, Mr Data." the Captain replies.

I tell him what happened, the plot to break Dirk Dreg out, and also hand him the computer chip with all the Dreg members on it.

"Very well done, Ensign Britney." Picard tells me.

That's a sentence I thought I'd never hear.

T'Pol and I hug each other as Desdemona is led away in chains. She stops to look at me in hatred.


"Don't think this is the end of the Dregs, Ensign Britney." she sneers, "Some of us will get out and be around. You will be top of our hit list for revenge. Admit it, you were a natural Dreg, and you sold us out to those you dislike conforming to."

Her comments hit a few sore points, but I did what I had to do. I can see that I can forget about getting a Christmas card from Desdemona.

"Good to have you back, sistah!" T'Pol tells me happily.

"Likewise." I reply, "I think this calls for an all-night session at the Disco AGoGo Nightclub!"

"Absolutely!"