Thursday, March 20, 2008
Guinan At The Milliner
Guest Poster: Guinan
Deanna Troi knows how to annoy the crew.
In between having her chocolate sundaes, she is parading around Ten Forward like a model in those new outfits that Captain Picard let her buy on that budget.
"Why did you let her buy so much?" I ask him as he has another drink. Clearly he is annoyed that Deanna managed to get so much, then saying the shop has a ' no return policy' on goods.
"I just hope the Admiral doesn't find out." Jean-Luc continues, "He will think the cash is for a fleet of shuttlecraft."
Still, if Deanna can do it, so can I.
"Captain, I need new outfits as well, and in particular new hats."
Jean-Luc groans and almost chokes on the salted peanuts he was eating.
"Not you as well, Guinan!" he exclaims.
"It's only fair." I tell him, "I have to be here for the crew all the time in Ten Forward. I need to look smart."
A few hours later, I am in the Starfleet Mall after I got the budget from Captain Picard, who was mumbling about Starfleet won't be able to afford to build any starships for the next year now.
I head straight for Millicent the Milliner, the leading hat specialist of the Federation. I get all of my headwear from them.
In fact, I probably keep them in business.
When I enter the shop, Millicent moves forward.
"Guinan!" she tells me happily, "I'm so glad you came, The accountants said we needed to get some extra money this month. With you here, I'm sure we'll be able to."
"What new hats do you have for me, Millicent?" I ask.
"Oh, we have some super original designs." she replies, "Many that no one else would wear...I mean no one else has worn. Really eyecatching."
I think I hear Millicent's assistant laugh slightly at this remark.
She urges one of her assisants to bring out a large red hat.
"Now this model is called 'The Starship', Guinan." Millicent explains, "I'm sure you'll love it."
I hear one shop assistant whisper to the other, "It's called that because you can land a starship on it!"
Millicent rebukes them for it, Despite their remarks, I decide to order it. There's nothing like an enormous hat!"
I order a few other hats, and she arranges to have them sent to the Enterprise. A few hours later, I am in Jean-Luc's Ready Room with Deanna.
"You two realise what you've done with your clothes buying over the last few days?" he says, "Starfleet can't afford all this."
Beverly enters, wearing a beautiful new Starfleet outfit. She fails to see Deanna and myself.
"Thanks for this fab new outfit, Jean-Luc." she says, "You're so generous in letting it come out of Enterprise expenses."
The Captain keeps urging her not to say anything, but it is too late, and we both know.
"Yes, thank you, Captain!" Deanna and I both say with a smile, as we leave the Ready Room.