Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Picard The Criminal (Part Two)

Guest Poster: Will Riker

Things are in a right mess now.

After the Cap was exposed to a device built by Professor Kalam, which was supposed to turn criminals into good guys, It had a reverse effect on him, and he has escaped from the Enterprise and is now embarking on a crime spree.

I've called a meeting of the senior staff to see how we are going to solve this. Kalam is with us as well.


"Well everybody, how can we solve this?" I ask, "I've already had reports from places over the quadrant that the Captain has starting robbing places. He is in the processes of accumulating a criminal gang together. As a result, the thieving is getting worse. They are called the Johnny Picard Gang."

"What will happen if someone catches him, Will." asks Beverly, "Some planets are not some lenient as we are. Jean-Luc could be in front of a firing squad, or his atoms dispersed into space before we know about it."

"I am confused about something." states Data, "From the reports and pictures we have received, the Captain is dressing and talking like a gangster from the 1920's era on Earth."

"I think it might be to do with the fact that the Captain likes to dress as Private Investigator Dixon Hill." analyses Deanna, "As a result of his personality change, he is now acting like that, except as a gangster."

"You're probably right, Deanna." I say, "The question here also is if we catch him, can we change him back? Professor?"

Kalam wakes up as if he has been dozing.

"What? Err..yes...ah." he starts, "Oh yes, exposure to the Mind Altering Device will definately return your Captain to the state he was."

"So how can we get hold of him?" Geordi asks.

"We should mount a full attack with guns and phaser rifles." T'Pol says firmly.

"That is true." agrees Seven, "A heavy assault would work. I could assimilate all his colleagues while you rescue Locutus."

I turn pale.

"Now look," I tell them, "We don't want something like that. It will cause a lot of bloodshed. If the Captain doesn't get injured, one of us will."

"You are suggesting a more subtle approach, Commander?" Worf asks, "After all, a concerted attack will be a good day to die."

I hate it when he says that!

"Yes, Worf." I reply, "More subtlety is definately needed. The only way we can capture the Captain is put someone really close within the gang, then get him out of there."

"He won't trust any of us," Ro observes, "The Captain will know exactly what is going on."

"There is one person he might trust." I say, "Beverly, would you be prepared to go into the gang, tell the Captain you've forsaken us and wanted to follow him and be his moll?"

Beverly looks shocked. After a few seconds she sees the logic of it.

"Very well, Will." I'll do it.

To be continued...


The Curmudgeon said...

I'm not at all certain that re-exposing the Captain to the same ray that caused the problem will somehow cure it. Beverly may have to become resigned to being a gangster's moll.

Anonymous said...

Well I haven't seen him around Crime Alley

I wonder who he has in his Gang

oh I am just curious

A Army Of (Cl)One said...

Riker is on the case, like a cop in a donut shop. Great now Riker will be thinking about donuts all day.

Ohhh Beverly as a gangster moll. Maybe Westly could be a gunsel.

Michael Manning said...

Problem Resolution indeed! Good job here as always jean-luc-picard!

Lavender said...

Can Beverly pull it off? Hope so, I want our old captain back! I think the device is as good a shot as any - assuming it really does work on real criminals....Love the way Worf and Seven responded ROFL!

Barriss Offee said...

I wish I had the time to cure him, Riker. Sadly I don't but maybe Doctor Who will be able to.

Optimus Prime said...

Perhaps I could reset his brain circuits with my Autobot Matrix of Leadership.

The Mistress of the Dark said...

Picard looks a lot like Dick Tracy :)

Linda said...

I have all the confidence in the world in Beverly - she can be one tough tomato when she has to be!

Titania Starlight said...

This is getting good. Can't wait to see how Beverly does as Picard's Moll. I know she can pull it off. Love this storyline. :o)

M. C. Pearson said...

Hmmm...wonder what Bev's gangster name will be?

eastcoastlife said...

Oh no! Captain Picard's turned bad boy. I dun want him to face the firing squad. I want to join him too!

Amanda said...

Beverly is probably secretly enjoying this role!

Ellee said...

Good luck Beverley, fun to be a "moll".

Squirrel said...

Too bad Jean-Luc is acting like a bad guy because he looks great in that trench coat get up!

Jean-Luc Picard said...

ECL, are you applying to be my moll?

I actually already have a moll. You'll have to wait for Part Three to see her. I got the images you'll see of my gang from a fancy dress site.

craziequeen said...

'Johnny Picard Gang' - [rotflmao]

I reckon Jean-Luc might revert to 'Good', but will Beverley be able to turn her back on her new Moll-status....??

It's decision time at the Palace..


Tricia said...

LOL Have I told you how much I love these posts? What will happen next ... ;)

Random Magus said...

It's getting curiouser and curiouser ;)

Lahdeedah said...


If Bev doesn't get to be the moll, she may do some damage to Picard!

I bet he's got some Klingons in his gang. You know, for the beef.

Vegeta said...

hmm releasing your inhibitons once in a while is good. sometimes.

Barbara said...

I hope Beverly remembers that she is not his moll.

Inertia said...

crime is fun....

susan said...

Heeee, this should be fun!

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Beverly may well like being a moll. I think she likes that sort of thing.

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