Today, I'm taking two members of the crew on an Attitude Adjustment Course in the holodeck.
They are Seven Of Nine and Ensign Ro Laren.
When Seven has always had a superior viewpoint over everyone, Ro Laren looks down on just the Cardassians. We have to confine her to her Quarters if a Cardassian happens to visit. Much as I dislike this race, we can't have Ro sneering at them and spitting.
It's just not diplomacy.
So Seven, Ro and I are in the holodeck, where I am going to instruct them on Attitude Adjustment. I would have had Riker do this, but he is too easy-going, and the Admirals have dictated that such courses must be carried out by the highest ranking officer.
"Now then, Seven and Ensign Ro" I start, "This course is designed to emphasise that a change in your general attitude and behaviour is required by you both here on the Enterprise."
"The Borg are supreme." Seven states coldly.
"Cardassians are filth." Ro says afterwards.
"Now you see" I tell them, "That's just the sort of thing we want to cut out. You may both have your own private feelings, but you should not display them in front of others."
"How can I when it's true?" asks Seven, "The Borg will eventually rule the galaxy and assimilate every being."
"And it's true that the Cardassians are the lowest form of life." Ro tells me, "The Bajorans will drive them away. Take my advice, Seven. Don't assimilate them, as it will only lower the quality of the Borg."
The two women start chatting together, ignoring me.
"Ladies!" I shout, "You are first and foremost part of the crew of the Enterprise. That is the most important feature. Seven, you must not look down on others and have a superior attitude over the other crew members."
Seven looks disappointed and rolls her eyes.
"Ro Laren" I say to her, "You must be more friendly towards Cardassians. While we have a treaty with them, you will have to treat them with respect."
Ro looks disappointed and rolls her eyes.
"Now then, ladies" I continue, "To see if you have understood my message, we will act out a scenario here in the holodeck to see what your reaction is. We'll start with Seven."
The holodeck changes to to an image of the transporter room.
"Certain people will emerge from the transporter" I tell them, "You must welcome them."
An 'Admiral' is created ans steps from the holographic transporter.
"Welcome to the Enterprise" says Seven, "I am Seven Of Ni..."
"A Borg drone!" says the Admiral, "Is it safe to come on board, or you going to assimilate me?"
Seven looks angry.
"The Borg are supreme." she shouts, "Resistance is Futile!"
The Admiral's image disappears.
"You see, Seven" I tell her, "You were goaded into making that error. You should have held your temper and smiled, welcoming him aboard. Now it's Ensign Ro's turn.
Seven sits down, muttering a few Borg expletives, as Ro Laren gets up.
A 'Cardassian Diplomat' beams on to the holographic transporter. Ro's face changes to extreme dislike. nonetheless she stays calm.
"Welcome to the Enterprise" she says, "I am Ensign Ro Lare..."
"A Bajoran!" exclaims the Cardassian, "Were you not in one of the work camps we built?"
Ro looks livid and gets her phaser and zaps the holographic Cardassian.
"Class is over, ladies." I tell them, "Clearly you both need more work to be done on your attitude adjustment."
As we leave, Seven and Ro chat away together.
"That was excellent shooting, Ensign Ro." says Seven, "That Cardassian was not worthy of living. I would not have bothered to assimilate him."
"Too right" agrees Ro, "The Borg do seem to have good taste in who they choose to assimilate."
They walk off talking and laughing.
Why do I think the Attitude Adjustment Course didn't quite work out?