Today an Inquiry is being held at Starbase 10 as to the behaviour of two Starfleet Officers on the 10th of this month on Deep Space Nine in which they were fighting each other.
The two Officers are Deanna Troi and Jadzia Dax.
Heading the Inquiry is Admiral De Sade, who is in charge of Discipline in Starfleet. Captain Sisko and I will also be there to investigate, as the we are responsible for the Officers concerned.
Sisko and I are seated at the table; De Sade marches in; he has a moustache, a goatee beard and long flowing hair.
"Where are the prisoners!" he demands.
"This is just an informal Inquiry, sir," I mention, "Usually in these things, we give them a modest verbal ticking off and nothing more is said."
De Sade mumbles disgustedly.
Deanna and Jadzia walk to the desks in front of us; they do not look at each other, but there is clearly tension between the two of them.
"Why aren't they in chains!" shouts De Sade, "They could escape at any moment!"
It's a perfectly secure place, sir." says Sisko, "They are not likely to go anywhere."
"Clap 'em irons, we would have done years ago" De Sade mumbles to himself.
"May I ask the first question, sir." I ask him. He agrees.
"Now, Counselor" I say to Deanna, "You were seen by Captain Sisko and myself fighting Lieutenant Dax at Deep Space Nine on the 10th of this month. Can you tell us why this took place?"
"She stole my man!" she angily tells me.
"Did not!" replies Jadzia, "Worf is my man, not yours!"
"No, he isn't!"
"Yes he is!"
The two of them look at each other in increasing anger, repeating their claims until the inevitable happens. They both jump out of the seats and start fighting each other in front of our table. They are pulling at each other's hair and trading punches.
The clerks at the door rush and pull them apart until they are both seated again. They hiss at each other; their carefully prepared hair is a mess.
"That's it!" shouts De Sade, "These two are worse than any hardened criminals I've seen. Place a guard next to each of them to see they don't move."
"Is it my understanding, Counselor?" I ask Deanna, "That you have a romantic association with Commander William Riker?"
"Err...yes." she haltingly replies.
"Then why do you need to have Lieutenant Worf as a second romance.
"It can be quiet, Captain" replies Deanna, "Will goes on all these missions. Worf is just a err... companion when he is away.
"Is that what you call it?" laughs Jadzia sarcastically. The two women exchange glances angily again.
"Now Lieutenant Dax," Sisko asks Jadzia, "Is it not true that you sent Lieutenant Worf a series of mystery love notes, and that you revealed you were the author of them when he visited Deep Space Nine?"
"Yes, that is what happened," replies Jadzia, "When I told him, he kissed me and said he would move to the station at the earliest opportunity."
"That's not true!" shouts Deanna, "Worf told me that he would always be on the Enterprise."
"You've got a shock coming, honey!" sneers Jadia.
The guards have to hold the two of them back.
"I'm going to send them both to a Penal Colony." says De Sade to us both, "Starfleet can't have this sort of indiscipline."
"There may be another solution, sir." I suggest to him. He listens and agrees.
"Call Lieutenant Worf." he declares to the court.
Worf enters the room, sees both Deanna and Jadzia and looks a little worried. he appears like he would rather be fighting twenty Romulans single handed.
"Now Lieutenant Worf," says De Sade, "You know the claims that these two women are making. They both profess to have a romantic attachment to you. What I am asking is which woman are you in love with?"
"Err..., Admiral" he haltingly answers, "I am very fond of both women romantically. Lieutenant Dax is a beautiful woman, whom I have declared an interest in. However, I am based on the Enterprise; Counselor Troi is wonderful and I will be more than happy to stay with her while I am there."
"Victory!" shouts Deanna, who laughs at Jadzia, who hisses back at her.
"So it is settled." says De Sade, " As long as Worf is on the Enterprise, he shall be with Counselor Troi."
The three of us leave our tables, with De Sade still saying they should all have gone to a Penal Colony.
Deanna and Jadzia have to both be escorted out as they still look as if they will start fighting at any moment.
"I'll get him, Troi, see if I do!" threatens Jadzia, "I'll be back!"
I wonder what Riker will make of all this?