Enterprise Christmas Party (Part Five)

Today is the final day of the party. Just two more entries to hear from, then my own version.

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This one is from Dddragon


I am SO nervous about this party! I have heard so many things about the famous Enterprise and her crew - it is very intimidating to be here in person, especially since this is my first tour of duty.

The day of the party is almost here. I've looked over my wardrobe several times in frustration. I don’t think I have anything that will do! And I’ve also gone through the replicator’s fashion catalog, but that didn’t help. I don’t know what to wear!!

Sighing, I return to the catalog, resolved to find something.

Suddenly there is a flash of light behind me. Startled, I turn around. A tall man was standing in my quarters!

“Don’t you know how to knock?” I frowned at him. I didn’t even hear the usual swoosh of the door, but then I HAD been rather intent on the catalog.

“Oh, I AM sorry,” he smiled at me. Or was that a smirk? “I thought that I might be able to help you find something to wear to the party.”

I was trying to think if I had ever seen him before. “Well,” I hesitated, “that’s very nice of you.” Had I mentioned somewhere that I didn’t have anything to wear? Hmmm. While on duty, on Ten Forward, in the dining hall …? I guess I must have sometime. “I was just going through the replicator fashion catalog again.”

“Oh, I’m sure that there must be SOMEthing in there you’ll like,” he said. He gave an odd flourish with his hand as he stepped up to the screen. “How about this one?”

The replicator screen now displayed a beautiful blue dress.

“Wow, I love it!” I exclaimed. “I can’t believe that I missed it before! Thank you SO much!”

He bowed. “Glad to be of help.” Straightening up again, he gave me that odd, almost smirky-smile. “If you aren’t already spoken for, I would love to be your escort to the party.”

“Oh, yes, that would be very nice!” My eyes had gone back to the screen. “I really love that dress! Thank you again!”

“No, thank YOU” he said.

When I turned around, he was gone. Drat – and I didn’t know his name! And that dratted door didn’t make swoosh again. I should have that looked into.

I didn’t have to worry about my date not showing up – he arrived at my door just in time. He looked really great, very dashing. Made me even more excited, knowing that I would have such a good-looking man with me. And in my excitement, I forgot to ask his name again. Talk about freshman jitters! I must’ve sounded pretty silly with my nervous chatter on the way to Ten Forward, but my date was very polite and didn’t let on if he thought that I was being silly.

Finally we arrived at the door and entered. Wow, we must look even better than I imagined – every single person in Ten Forward froze and turned to look at us! I put on my best smile and looked up at my date (at this point I was very embarrassed to realized that I STILL didn’t know his name!).

It was at this point that everyone in the room said the same thing: “oh, no - Q!”

Why is the Captain rolling his eyes like that?

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Last, but by no means least, of the entries is this account by Ciera


It was a boring night at the library, with the librarian director breaking out into song every once in a while, and always in Italian. I wasn't working this night, just surfing the net and bloggng and doing whatever else a single young woman can do online without getting into trouble. I sigh and decide to get out before the director can talk me into working so that he can leave early {he does that all the time!}

I step out into the chilly night, running into another substitute for the library and standing on the sidewalk we talk for severla minutes about, well, nothing. We are quite good at that.

In the middle of our discussion on nothing, Jen points up at the sky and says, "What's that?"

Of course I look. I mean, who wouldn't with that original leadin queestion? I see an unusually large star, that is increasingly getting closer. "I dunno," is my wisest reply. Could it be the Captain? I think, remembering that months ago he had promised me a dance at the Enterprise's Christmas Party. I feel the grip of a transporter beam take hold of me and am amused at Jen's open mouth gape before I disappear.

However, her face was not replaced by Captain Picard, or even that insufferable ladies man Riker. Instead, I see - of all things!

"Fluke? What are you doing here?"

"I'm giving you a ride to the party," Fluke Starbucker says, somewhat indignantly.

"But..." I step off the transporter pad, feeling myself beginning to stutter. I scratch my head and say, "But, are you allowed? I mean, you're not listed on the Captain's Guest list..."

"Well, sweetheart, you're the one telling this story, not me." Fluke shrugs. "I was told to be here at seven pm and beam you up and hussle your butt over to the Enterprise toute sweet, so here I am. Now, unless you want to walk through space..."

"No, no...that's fine. Just, give me someplace so I can change and try not to run into any trouble on the way, ok?"

"What? Trouble in this part of the Galaxy? Unheard of." Fluke shakes his head and motions to his flunkie...I mean, his CSO... "Sprok, take her to the 'fresher room and then get up to the bridge."

"Yes sir."

I ignore Sprok the entire 2 minutes it takes for us to get to the 'fresher room. I mean, the guy looks so familiar that it's rather freaky. Once inside, I lock the door. Out of my purse, I pull out my make-up kit and becasue this is make believe, by the time I am done, I am dressed in a red Starfleet uniform, complete with communicator.

As I come out of the room, Sprok raises his eyebrow and says, "Impressive."

"Weren't you supposed to go up to the bridge?" I ask him.

"He sent me back to get you."

"Like I couldn't find my way on my own," I mutter under my breath as I follow after him.

10 minutes later, we come out onto the bridge and I am still muttering. I swear, he walked us around in circles the entire time. I see that we aren't moving and say, "Why arent't we moving?"

"Ahhh," Fluke stutteres and stumbles over his words. "Well, I don't know where to go. These were the rendezvous coordinates, but was you can see - they're not here."

"Oh bother!" I say and sit in the nearest seat. I pout for at least a minute while the other two are silent. "Can I see the coordinate list?"

Fluke starts rifling through papers on his desk. "Uhm, sure - it's here somewhere. Sprok..."

"Yessir." Immediately he starts going through the trash can. "Ah, here they are."

The paper I am handed is covered in...ketchup and gravy. Ew. I ponder the numbers for a few minutes, double check them with the coordinates on the nav board and am relieved that we are exactly where we are suuposed to be. Except the Enterprise isn't here. I even check the date and time stamp, and yes, we're exactly where we are supposed to be when we're supposed to be here.

"Maybe an Interplanetary war broke out and they're stuck in traffic," I suggest.

Fluke sighs and looks greatly relieved. "Maybe. It is the right time of year for that to break out in this sector."

"Have you checked the news reports?" I ask.

Fluke and Sprok look guiltily at each other. Sprok turns to his viewfinder and starts looking into it. Fluke looks at him quizzically and then comes to stand near me. "He does that all the time...I have no idea what he's doing."

"Does he come up with the right answers?" I ask.

Fluke looks startled but doesn't answer.

No one says anything more as we wait...and wait...and wait...

"Oh, are you waiting for me to say something?" Sprok asks.

"Well, duh!" replies Fluke. "Now quit making the lady wait and tell us what you foun out."

"Oh, yes...the Enterprise is behind us."

"Behind us?" I sigh and shake my head at the stupidity of it all.

"Yes Ma'am," Sprok answered. "They have been hailing us since our arrival, howver, someone pushed the mute button and so they have went unheard."

"The mute button?"

Fluke smacks his forehead. "Doh!" he said. "Well, don't just stand there man, unmute us and hail them back! Inform them that we have...uhm, what's your name again?"

I roll my eyes. "Lt. Commander Ciera."

"That's it?" asks Fluke. "Just Ciera? No last name?"

"That's it," I reply.

"Have you...?"

"They are awaiting her transport signal," answers Sprok.

The three of us travel back down to the transporter room, Fluke and Sprok quietly ... uhm ... talking amongst themselves. I hope they aren't talking about me behind my back, but I'd really rather not ask.

I step onto the transport pad and wait to be beamed over to the Enterprise. I wave by to Fluke and Sprok and soon am standing on the transporter pad in front of Commander Riker.

Once again, I am shown to a guest room where I can change and freshen up. Stickler that I am for protocol, I simply program the replicator to spit me out a dress uniform. However, I arrange my hair in an elaborate twist with stray curls on my neck and slide in dangly diamond earrings.

At the party, there is a greeting line where all of the guests shake hands with the Enterprise's senior staff. Everyone is pleasant enough; well, Worf was gruff, but that's normal for him.

I wander around and sample the wide array of food they brought in...ok ok ok, I spent most of my time sampling the chocolates.

"I trust everything is to your satisfaction," comes the Captian's voice from my side.

I look up at him and smile. "Well, yes...I wish there had been a donut or two, but perhaps next year."

Jean-Luc, I mean, Captain Picard chuckles at me and says, "I believe you are on my dance card."

Before I know it, I am wisked off to the the dance floor. We make small talk for a moment or two before I say, "I brought the holodeck programs that you asked for."

"You did? Excellent."

"I have thought of nothing else since you asked."

I slip the holochips in his back pocket while we dance, and smile as we part ways.

I sample more chocolates, looking for donuts but not finding any, rather enjoying eavesdropping on conversations as others approach the food bar. My favorite conversation was rather early on, between Trinity 13 and a woman with a towel wrapped around her head ... 'Is this for real?" asked the woman with the towwl as she helped herself to a glass of Klingon Firewater.

"Real?" asks Trinity13. "What is real?"

I couldn't help but put my two cents in by saying, "Reality is highly overrated."

They looked at me strangely, but didn't comment.

That's all folks, because I highly doubt you'd want to hear about the discussion I had with the Vulcan regarding logic...it was highly illogical...

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Now, after all those accounts, what did I see happen?

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It all seemed a disorganised mess when I stepped into Ten Forward.

People were rushing around, food was laid out, and the band was practising by playing out-of-tune music.

Suddenly, Riker quietly informed me that the party was about to start.

The male staff were dressed up in their tuxedos and we were still waiting for our dates.

Trisha Lewis was the first on the scene; she had a black dress slit down the side, which went well with her blonde hair. Geordi gulped.

She grabbed him by the hand and said, "Come on my man! It's time to show these people what real dancing is all about.

Deanna came next; she wore a white low-cut dress with a necklace. Riker was most imopressed. I did notice that Worf was paticularly impressed as well.

Beverly appeared in a gorgeous silver dress that emphasised her red hair.

"Good evening, Jean-Luc."

"Welcome to the party, Beverly."

Data was waiting for Jennifer, whom nobody could find. I did notice another woman taking him away somewhere, though.

I stepped on to the stage for the announcement.

"Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to the Enterprise Christmas Party. Enjoy yourself."

As the Captain is supposed to start off the dancing, Lieutenant Commander Ciera, a promising young officer asks me if she could join me in the opening number.

I take her hand and we glide on, as the band plays 'Fly Me To The Moon'

Fly me to the moon
And let me play among the stars
Let me see what spring is like
On Jupiter and Mars
In other words hold my hand
In other words darling kiss me

After the dance, I am informed by Worf that the brig already had some occupants, including a Captain. He tells me there is someone present in the room calling himself an Intergalactic Gladiator, and a professor that looks remarkably like myself.

Thats a fine start! If it carries on like that, all of the guests in the party will be there instead of in Ten Forward.

Worf then had a plentiful supply of Bloodwine, and asked Deanna for a dance. Riker glared somewhat, but as he was with Sid doing a trombone session, he could hardly say anything.

About ten minutes later, Data staggers back into the room. He states that he has been given a strange chip by a woman, and now the chip had exploded through overuse.

"What did the chip do, Data?" I ask.

"I would rather not say, Captain." he answers, with a slightly red face, "I'm allright now, though."

Jennifer Baxter comes in.

"Someone knocked me out and placed me in a Jeffries Tube!" she says.

There are definately some strange goings on tonight.

The two of them go off to dance the latest song being played, 'Heavy Metal Man'.

I see Wesley on the other side of the room; I do my best to avoid seeing him. However he notices me, and waves at me, so I have to wave back at him. Wesley seems slightly annoyed that there isn't something for him to do, like help in an interplanetary war, or save the Enterprise from destruction by saving the warp core. A young lady gets his attention, though.

Poor girl.

Now it was time for all the staff to join in and do the novelty songs. Worf was looking particularly annoyed.

Sid shouts, "Let's do the Time Warp!"

It's astounding, time is fleeting
Madness takes its toll
But listen closely, not for very much longer
I've got to keep control

I remember doing the TIme Warp
Drinking those moments when
The blackness would hit me and the void would be calling
Let's do the time warp again...
Let's do the time warp again!

It's just a jump to the left
And then a step to the right
With your hands on your hips
You bring your knees in tight
But it's the pelvic thrust that really drives you insane,
Let's do the Time Warp again!

It's so dreamy, oh fantasy free me
So you can't see me, no no no not at all
In another dimension, with voyeuristic intention
Well-secluded, I see all
With a bit of a mind flip
You're there in the time slip
And nothing can ever be the same
You're spaced out on sensation, like you're under sedation
Let's do the Time Warp again!

Well I was walking down the street just a-having a think
When a snake of a guy gave me an evil wink
He shook me up, he took me by surprise
He had a pickup truck and the devil's eyes.
He stared at me and I felt a change
Time meant nothing, never would again
Let's do the Time Warp again!

Now it was on to 'Star Trekkin'

Star Trekkin' across the universe
On the Starship Enterprise
Under Captain Kirk
Star Trekkin' across the universe
Boldly going forward 'cause we can't find reverse

(Lieutenant Uhura, report)
There's Klingons on the starboard bow
Starboard bow
Starboard bow
There's Klingons on the starboard bow
Starboard bow Jim

(Analysis, Mr. Spock)
It's life, Jim
But not as we know it
Not as we know it
Not as we know it
It's life, Jim
But not as we know it
Not as we know it, Captain

There's Klingons on the starboard bow
Starboard bow
Starboard bow
There's Klingons on the starboard bow
Starboard bow Jim

Star Trekkin' across the universe
On the Starship Enterprise
Under Captain Kirk
Star Trekkin' across the universe
Boldly going forward (still can't find reverse!)

(Medical outlook, Dr. McCoy)
It's worse than that
He's dead, Jim
Dead Jim
Dead Jim
It's worse than that
He's dead, Jim
Dead Jim
Dead!

It's life Jim
But not as we know it
Not as we know it
Not as we know it
It's life Jim
But not as we know it
Not as we know it, Captain

There's klingons on the starboard bow
Starboard bow
Starboard bow
There's klingons on the starboard bow
Starboard bow, Jim!

(Starship captain, James T. Kirk)
Ah! We come in peace
Shoot to kill
Shoot to kill
Shoot to kill
We come in peace
Shoot to kill
Shoot to kill Men

It's worse than that
He's dead Jim
Dead Jim
Dead Jim
It's worse than that
He's dead Jim
Dead Jim
Dead!

Well It's life Jim
But not as we know it
Not as we know it
Not as we know it
It's life Jim
But not as we know it
Not as we know it, Captain

There's Klingons on the starboard bow
Starboard bow
Starboard bow
There's Klingons on the starboard bow
Scrape 'em off Jim!

Star Trekkin' across the universe
On the starship enterprise
Under Captain Kurk
Star Trekkin' across the universe
Boldly going forward and things are getting worse!

(Engine room, Mr. Scott)
Ye canna change the laws of physics
Laws of physics
Laws of physics
Ye canna change the laws of physics
Laws of physics Jim

Ah! We come in peace
Shoot to kill
Shoot to kill
Shoot to kill
We come in peace
Shoot to kill
Scotty Beam me up!

It's worse than that
He's dead Jim
Dead Jim
Dead Jim
It's worse than that
He's dead Jim
Dead Jim
Dead!

Well It's life Jim
But not as we know it
Not as we know it
Not as we know it
It's life Jim
But not as we know it
Not as we know it Captain

There's Klingons on the starboard bow
Starboard bow
Starboard bow
There's Klingons on the starboard bow
Starboard bow Jim

Ye canna change the script Jim,och ee Jimmy

It's worse than that, it's physics, Jim

Bridge to engine room, warp factor nine!

Och, if I give it any more she'll blow, Cap--(massive explosion)

*red alert numerous times*

Star Trekkin' across the universe
On the Starship Enterprise, under Captain Kirk
Star Trekkin' across the universe
Boldly going forward 'cause we cant find reverse
Star Trekkin' across the universe
ample parking day or night, under Captain Kirk



We then tried to do the Okey Cokey, but Worf failed at this, as he left leg in when he should have been shaking it all about.

after all this, Sid Starr was a little worn out, and the nurse provided the oxygen mask. A moment or two later, he carried on.

The food and drink was running out fast. The regular supplies from Federation Foodies had gone long ago, and the replicators were at full strength.

Geordi had passed out and was under the table. I don't know whether this was due to the excessive drink or the dancing he was forced to do with Trisha Lewis.

"Okay folks" announces Sid, "The party is starting to come to a close; get your partners for the last waltz."

Beverly approaches.

"Time for our dance, Jean-Luc." she says warmly, as we take our place for the waltz. Riker and Deanna are locked together, so are Jennifer and Data. Tricia is holding Geordi up, or doesn't seem awake.

The band plays away...

Why do birds
Suddenly appear?
Everytime you are near
Just like me
They long to be
Close to you

Why do stars
Fall down from the sky?
Everytime you walk by
Just like me
They long to be
Close to you

On the day that you were born
The angels got together and decided
To create a dream come true
So they sprinkled moondust in your hair
Of gold and starlight in your eyes of blue

That is why all the girls in town
Follow you all around
Just like me
They long to be
Close to you

Just like me
They long to be
Close to you

Woo... close to you

As the song ends, we kiss.

"Happy Christmas, Beverly."

"Happy Christmas, Jean-Luc."

Now that's what I call a party!

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And a Happy Christmas to all those out there, especially those who have appeared as guests, and made this a party to remember.