Tuesday, December 09, 2008

The Enterprise Senior Staff Christmas Meal (Part One)

"I thought we had just had our party, sir?" Riker says to me in my Ready Room, "Why are we having this Christmas meal.....before the day?"

"It's very easy, Number One." I reply, "It's a chance for all the senior ataff to get together in a pleasant way, have a chat and enjoy a Christmas dinner. After all, we can't do this on the day itself, as we all go off to see families and friends then."

"Should we have Ensign Britney, T'Pol or Seven of Nine, then?" Riker queries, "After all, they are hardly err..."

"Senior staff?" I say, "Be charitable, Commander Riker. Britney & T'Pol might be a noisy couple, but thisd might encourage them to behave in a more civilised manner. As for Seven, I think this quiet, sit-down meal might be a good lesson for her to report back to her Borg superiors."

"I hope you're right, sir." he says.

So do I.


A few hours later, the table is beautifully decorated with Christmassy items, and the senior staff file in, looking around curiously. Britney, wearing leather boots, trousers, plus a top hat and blonde wig, but sporting a bare midriff, runs to one of the seats and calls out to T'Pol at the top of her voice.

"Yay! I bags this chair!" she yells, "T'Pol, you sit there and we can do some serious chatting."

She eagerly does, and the other senior staff sit down calmly...until T'Pol and Britney start throwing bread rolls around.

"You will refrrain from throwing those rolls around or you will be assimilated!" says Seven to them sharply.

"Party pooper!" Britney mumbles, "Now sistah, what was the lastest gossip?"

Everybody seems seated with their parners. I'm with Bev, Riker is with Deanna, Worf is with Jadzia, Britney has T'Pol, Data has Jennfer Baxter, Geordi LaForge is with Trisha Lewis. The only one left out is Ro Laren, who is looking miserable with Lieutenant Barclay.

She is always secretive about her boyfriend. I believe she has one, but does not let anyone know about him. I wonder way?

My train of thought is derailed with the shrieks of Britney and T'Pol, as the latter has spilled a glass of Ktaran wine on the tablecloth.

I groan and roll my eyes, and try not to look at Riker, who is wearing his smug 'I told you so' expressions.

Ah well. It might get better.

Then again, it might not.

To be continued...


The Curmudgeon said...

At family gatherings in my past, we'd have a "kids table."

The definition was flexible: I remember one Thanksgiving at my parents' house (many years ago now, sadly) where my father noted that everyone at the "kids' table" was pushing 30.

Perhaps, Captain, if you ever try this one again, and if you try and invite T'Pol and Ensign Britney again... perhaps they should be at your "kids' table?"

Linda said...

Yep, I'm with Curmudgeon, we used to have a kids' table for all of these kind of gatherings and it worked out great as it was in the kitchen while all of the mature folks were in the main dining room. Sound like next time you should create a kids' table and let the girls go have some fun of their own!

Titania Starlight said...

What a great dinner and maybe next time a kids table would be just the ticket for those with childlike tendencies. :o)~

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

A kid's table is definitely a good idea.

That or perhaps knock-out pills in the entree...

Jean-Luc Picard said...

You all seem to be of the same opinion: a separate table for the rowdy |Britney & T'Pol...or should that be separate room?

Livingsword said...


Poor Ro….she is one of my faves….

Lahdeedah said...

A kids table, in the other room, with some chaperones...

EastCoastLife said...

I wouldn't want to leave my kids at the kids' table with Britney and T'Pol. :(

Michael Manning said...

"A noisy couple". That just may be the understatement of the year! :D)

STAG said...

I volunteer to run the Kids table.

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