Monday, July 04, 2005

Conference

We're a little busy right now. The Enterprise has been engulfed by a mysterious cloud and cannot move. However, we think we know the solution.

Have a conference in the Ready Room and talk about it.

LaForge chips in with reversing the polarity of the warp core, which will create an anti matter fusion device and scatter the cloud.

Not that old chestnut again. He fails to mention that there is a 90% chance the ship will explode.

Worf suggests a direct approach.

"Launch a full spread of photon torpedoes together with tetrion particles and destroy everything in sight. It is a good day to die."

Why do I always feel depressed when I listen to Worf?

Beverly thinks we may not be able to handle the casualties if we adopt such a procedure.

"Not even if we activate the Emergency Medical Hologram?" I ask.

Beverly mumbles a few disparaging words about the EMH.

Deanna Troi is having empathic thoughts and thinks the cloud is alive and might be trying to communicate with us.

Riker suggests that I pilot a shuttlecraft into the heart of the cloud.

Is the man mad?

Data finally says something.

"The Counselor might be right about the cloud being alive. Perhaps if we show we are a peaceful ship, it will let us go?"

"How do we do that, Data?"

"I have no input on that matter."

Troi interrupts by suggesting we all go in a yoga trance and think peaceful thoughts.

Worf disgustedly adds, "I still think we should obliterate it."

Ten minutes later, the entire crew of over 1000 is sitting in a harmonic trance in a lotus position with a peaceful "Ummm" coming from them all.

As we do, the cloud gradually vanishes away.

Everybody gets up, with the problem over.

"Excuse me, Captain." says Worf, irritatingly, "I have some aliens to kill in the holodeck."

18 comments:

kenju said...

I'm glad you solved the problem, Captain; perhaps we can have a millenium of peace now?

Michele sent me.

Trinity13 said...

Ahh, I love Worf...almost as much as I love Wesley!!!

Robin said...

Very curious.....

Paul Nichols said...

Here from Michele's.

Jamie said...

Funny, as usual!

The Corporal said...

I don't know how I got here, but I'm glad I came. An incredibly creative idea, and a very interesting read.

Awesome Stuff...

xtessa said...

i think i encountered that cloud the other week...;)

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Did the harmonic thoughts do it or did the cloud just dissipate because of stellar winds or something?

Jean-Luc Picard said...

These clouds and anomilies we keep coming up against are more trouble than they are worth.

R.A. Slater said...

Probably Q harrassing you...you know how he likes anomalies...

True Jersey Girl said...

So...yoga cures all?

J Anderson said...

Typical Worf and LaForge. The EMH is a pain though! You get sick of him after Voyager!

Kimberly said...

Hmmmm, I think Deanna needs to stop passing around those cosmic mushrooms ;-)

Pirate Princess said...

Never knew there was so much in yoga... must try it sometime. Glad your conference worked for you captain.

Heather said...

I was assimilated by the Borg and encountered some hostile Klingon at the Las Vegas Hilton last week. I have a picture of the Borg on my blog.

Anonymous said...

CooL! Emergency Medical Hologram!! I want one of those Captain!! I saw a coffee maker yesterday at the store and it reminded me of the place where you guys get beamed uP!

Jean-Luc Picard said...

MommaK, you may be right about Deanna.

Heather Nicole, you're not the Borg Queen by any chance, are you?

Mrs Mogul, you may have a very advanced coffee maker there.

Ciera, you may be right about Q.

RenaSherwood said...

Those clouds are contantly irritating--d'ya think they're God's farts?