Monday, September 13, 2010

Jadzia & Worf's Honeymoon (Part One)

Guest Poster: Worf

Jadzia and I have arrived at the Hotel Amour on the planet Lurrve for our honeymoon. We are both looking forward to it. My shoulder is still aching a little from Jadzia having broken my clavicle on our wedding night. She did not ralise that the man is supposed to break the woman's bone for good luck. 

Still, as long as a clavicle is broken, then that is all right. Both of us go up to the Reception.

"Err...hello." says the weird looking receptionist, as he glares at me, "I'm Alan, what can I do for you?"

Jadzia does her best to stop laughing at the fact that an alien has such a name. Obviously given to him by the hotel, as his real name is probably unpronouncable.

"Well...errr....Alan." giggles Jadzia, "I am Jadzia Dax, and this is my new husband, Worf. We booked the Honeymoon Suite some time ago, so can..."

Alan looks panic stricken and hastily bsays, without looking at the list, "Err....we're full up...go somewhere else."

I am about to go into Klingon Warrior mode, but Jadzia beats me to it.

"Now listen, flatface!" she shouts, pulling him across the reception desk, "My husband and I booked this room through through GlobalWeb Hotel Bookings. I have the receipt right here."

"Yes." Alan replies, "But you did not say that one of the guests would be a Klingon."

"So?" we both ask.

"Well." he explains, "We have had to impose a policy because Klingon guests in the past have got up to raucuous behaviour in the past, and often trashed the rooms."

"If you let us in." I tell him angrily, "I won't trash the hotel room....and I won't tear up the reception, either!"

"Very well." he says reluctantly, "You may stay."

After the two of us have our room keys we head to the elevator.

"Are you sure you won't trash the room, Worfie?" she asks me.

"I won't." I reply, "But after a few bottles of wine, I can see YOU doing it, Jadzia!"

To be continued......


The Curmudgeon said...

The hotel has a long list of banned guests. Not just Klingons but musicians as well. The Strolling Bones did a number on an entire wing a couple of star dates back. The hotel will still serve classical musicians -- unless they are performing Klingon classics. Klingon classical musicians, who are always afraid of being called sissies by their warrior friends, have been known to trash their rooms, their neighbors' rooms and most of the bellhops just so they can hold their heads up in what passes for polite Klingon society.

I'll bet you'd not heard that one before....

Fly Girl said...

Klngons banned from the hotel! I'll be sure not to patronize this place for such disciminiatory practices.

Ellee Seymour said...

I hope they have a happy honeymoon.

Linda said...

Hmmmm, this is not the best start to a honeymoon that I've seen but at least they got their room. Let's hope the rest goes without incident - though I doubt it!

Michael Manning said...

Haha! "If you let us in, I won't trash the hotel room....and I won't tear up the reception, either!" Seems reasonable to me. :)