Thursday, July 19, 2007

Honeymoon Abductors (Part Three)

Guest Poster: Will Riker

Deanna, Worf, Jadzia and myself are in a jail cell on a spaceship bound for the planet Valder. We had been posing as married couples, along with the Cap and Beverly as the couples had been disappearing from the honeymoon planet of Gemini.

It seems this madman named Valder, who is a nut of the first order has named a planet after himself and is taking us all there so that a new world can be born.

We can only hope that the Cap can pick up our trail and rescue us.


"We've got to find a way to break out of here." I say to Deanna and to the others who are in the next cell."

"Are you crazy, mate?" pipes up a voice. It is a man in another cell with his wife.

"Why?" I reply, "Don't you realise you and your wife have been captured by a lunatic and are on the way to spending the rest of your lives on an isolated planet."

"Sure." he tells me, "That's paradise to the missus and me. I'm Garan and the missus is Lynette. No more worries, annoying relatives, cadging from next door neighbours. It's a life of idylic splendour. Don't rock the boat for us by escaping."

I sigh.

"We're not going to get any help from the others imprisoned here." I say, "It looks like they're quite keen to go."

"Well." suggests Deanna hesitantly, "It might not be a bad idea. We could all get married and have a good life with no hassle."

I think briefly of that thought that Deanna's mother Lwaxana would not be around, then come to my senses. After all, there would be no donuts on the planet.

"DEANNA!" I exclaim, "We're Starfleet Officers. We can't go along with this!"

She sighs and agrees, saying it was just a thought she had. I wonder.


Valder comes sweeping in with his black cape again.

"Soon." he tells us, "We will be arriving at Valder! Our new world will be waiting for us. Lands of fruit, peaceful living abound, together with the daily prayers at the statue of myself I have had built."

"Sorry I thought of staying there, Will." Deanna whispers, "Valder is crazy."

The ship rocks suddenly; the troll guard tells Valder that the Enterprise has followed and is attacking. He hurriedly leaves with the troll.

Worf breaks through the bars during the commotion, gets the keys and releases us all.

The Cap and Beverly beam on with Security and start to take over the ship.

"I see everything is alright here, Number One." he says, "Security will capture Valder and send all the other couples back home."

"Don't do that, mate." says Garan and Lynette together.

They step forward.

"You see, Captain" continues Garan, "We've talked to the other couples on board, and it seems they are looking forward to starting a new world together. Naturally, the Valder statue would get torn down, but aside from that, we want to live on the planet."

The Cap looks perplexed.

"Sometimes villains can do the right thing without knowing it, Captain." says Deanna.

"It baffles me." he replies.

"Perhaps you have to be married first, Jean-Luc?" suggests Beverly.


Authors note: thanks to SFGirl (Nina) for the following Award:

I'm really grateful for this; thank you, Nina.

Also, Faberadatch left a meme to list 8 facts about me. As Will Riker is doing this post, I'll leave it to him...

1: I have a donut replicator with flavours from all planets.

2: When the Cap is away, I can't wait too sit in the chair.

3: Whenever I meet Lwaxana, I have to guard what I think as her telepathic abilities might spot that she annoys me with her wedding calls.

4: Deanna likes my beard.

5: I like to send crewmen to do awful jobs as that is what the Commander used to do with me.

6: I can't stand the Cap calling me 'Number One'.

7: I also can't stand the Cap saying 'Make it so.'

8: I give the Cap subtle hints about whether it is time for him to retire.


The Curmudgeon said...

But no word about the refunds?

Oh, I suppose, Star Fleet will have to do all the paperwork on that now that you're rescued.

Anonymous said...

hey! i'm going to cali this weekend and won't be back until is the website i was talking about where i made extra summer cash. Later! the website is here

Amanda said...

Riker, why do you always walk with a slight tilt to your head?

Professor Xavier said...


Beverly mentioned the M word! Abandon ship! Abandon ship!

swirly girl said...

Wonderful tie up!

Titania Starlight said...

I forgot what I was going to write when I saw Amanda's question. Oh my God that is funny!

Oh yes... does this mean there are wedding bells in Capt. Picards future?

Linda said...

You've got to admit, there is some definite appeal to the sounds of a planet with no interfering relatives!

Love the 8 things about Mr. Riker. Should he ever tire of his donut replicator, perhaps he could send it over to me??

Lavender said...

Ahahahahaha! Oh, when we were newlyweds we wouldve loved it there! No in-laws! LOL That was a surprise ending - Cheers!

Lansy said...

LoL, commander Riker ended it so soon! It sounded like a wishful thinking to avoid the double shifts in rice field. :P

Where's Valder's secret attracted beam? Captain and Beverly may get a chance to taste the marriage officiated by Valder.

sfgirl said...

So,why DOES Riker walk with his head in a constant tilt? Is he listening to a Data-chip so he can walk and talk at the same time?

Fab said...

Hey, thank you Will Riker to comply instead of the Captain. You are no doubt his N°1. And how typical of the Captain to pass it on to his second in command.
The 8facts were exactly what I expected and fits the whole blog theme. So nicely done.

Ellee said...

Hey, I didn't know you had a beard.

The Mistress of the Dark said...

I think that was a hint from Beverly

Beckie said...

You have a beard?

Michele sent me over to say Hello!

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Beckie, Ellee, RIKER has a beard, not me!!

MOTD, Lansy, Titania, there are NOT wedding bells for the Captain and Beverly!

Fab, glad you liked the meme.

Lavender, that ending seemed the natural conclusion to me.

Amanda, Titania, that is a good question about why Riker walks with a tilt to his head. I have no idea!

Linda, I can't see Riker tiring of his donut replicator.

Mr. Althouse said...

Congratulations on your award.

Michele sent me

mrsmogul said...

It's better than being called NUMBER TWO. At first I thought you wrote Will Wheaton instead of Wil RIker.

gautami tripathy said...

Glad michele sent me again to the star trek blog!

Congratulations for that award!

utenzi said...

Michele sent me over, Captain Picard.

The thing I like the most about Riker's post is the picture of Deanna. The future is looking good!

Lazy Daisy said...

Congrats on the your imagination (isn't that the last frontier?) Michele sent me.

Diane J. said...

Yep, it's grandmother duties for me this weekend, Jean-Luc.

Love the meme, but I wonder how you feel about #1's feelings toward you?? LOL! ;D

Have a great weekend!



craziequeen said...

Donut replicator??

Wow - I'd better not mention such an invention to my civil servant colleagues...the civil service runs on donuts.....

Hi J-L, Michele sent me to see Rikers 8 Things. Mind you, I think all your guest posters should complete the 8 Things :-)


dragonflyfilly said...

well, you can start to worry when you see tables full of cups and pitchers of Kool-Aid (sorry, i'm still a bit obsessed with the LE thing!)...but pity McGyver isn't there with you.

Maybe i will join you...i have heard nothing for the past two days about Harry Potter, Harry Potter Harry Potter and the Hoary Hallows or whatever....enuf already...

anyway, i'm sure the "enterprising" starfleet crew will manage a quick escape at the last the force be with you!!!!

cheers for now,

oh, and when you do manage to get free, remember to stop by my Blog and submit your suggestion for a name for "teddy". [thanks]

dragonflyfilly said...

didn't edit this before publishing: should read:

"i have heard nothing except Harry Potter" etc.

Lee Ann said...

Just stopped over to say hi!
Thanks for stopping by.
Have a great weekend!

Darth Nepharia said...

I'll be interested to see what happens when Valder gets to his planet and discovers he already has a rebellion on his hands.

Adventures In Waitressing said...

Congrats on your new award! Loved the story as aways. Great job.

AKA The Real Life Drama Queen

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Thanks everyone for the kind comments about the Award.

Dragonflyfilly, I'll take a look.

Lee Ann, welcome to my Journal.

CQ, a donut replicator in the civil service sounds dangerous!

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