Walking 15 miles across desert sand under the blazing hot sunshine of some planet is not my idea of a fun time.
But here I am, trying to find the lifesigns that the tricorder was identifying. The signal is so close I must be nearly there now. A mile or so ahead, the land is green with a few mountainous areas.
All the supplies are gone, and I'm staggering along as if I've had twenty Bajoran Brandies.
That's it. I collapse. In the distance, a few voices are heard.
I wake to find myself in bed and being looked after by a lot of friendly human-type aliens bringing fruit and looking in wonder. The fruit is the best food I've ever tasted.
An old man sits nearby.
"Greetings" he says, "You are truly a god."
"Sorry?" I say in puzzlement.
"No one has crossed the great Desert Rift before. You must be a god who has come to visit us from beyond. Allow us to present you with all we have."
I'm brought the most wonderful fruit by the natives. The women are all beautiful; they would all win the Miss Starfleet Pageant.
The old man brings the best looking one to me.
"This is my daughter" he says, "She would like to marry you and be the wife of a god."
The girl is just 19 and the most enchanting woman I have ever met. I eagerly agree to the marriage.
"You shall live here in paradise" her father says.
At last, just what I've always wanted, after a long life fighting aliens, being diplomatic, playing Captain. The chance to be truly happy. Let Riker have the Enterprise.
I hear a ruffle through the trees, and a sound.
Oh no, not them.
I grudgingly turn and see Riker & Beverly between the branches.
"Go away!" I whisper loudly.
"He's obviously delirious from his desert crossing." Beverly says to Riker.
"Three to beam up" Riker whispers in his Comlink.
I groan as I feel myself dissembling.
It's replicator food time again.