Tuesday, February 27, 2007

The Omega Dimension (Part One)



Guest Poster: The Borg Queen

I am really feeling rather bored today; we on Unimatrix 01 haven't assimilated a single species all week.

As a result, I shouted at two drones and had them disconnected just because they did not bring me my favourite nourishment this morning. They should know I like cornflakes, and not Rice Krispies.

However, I've thought of something that'll cheer me up. I shall assimilate the crew of the Enterprise. It's about time I did that for Locutus. I can get Seven Of Nine back on my Cube as well. It will raise the morale of the Cube as well, as I know the drones like having Seven Of Nine around.

---------------

I send Seven a message via the Hive Mind, and she agrees to stand by. I know where their ship is, so we shall collect them. I have had the drones clean the Assimilation Chamber. Seven has given me a list saying who she wants first in the queue.



"Put Beverly Crusher first in the queue!" she tells me, "This doctor had the audacity to tell me I used to be a human named Annika Hansen."

I think I ought to keep quiet on that subject to Seven; I think the truth might distress her.

-------------

A few hours later, we appear in Alpha Quadrant space after using the Transwarp Corridor; the Enterprise is nearby. I open hailing frequencies.

"Hello Locutus." I say pleasantly, "This is the Borg Queen of Unimatrix 01. Prepare to be boarded and assimilated."

Locutus looks panic stricken. His lackey Riker has dropped a donut he was eating, and all the alarm bells are going on their ship.

"You said you were not going to assimilate us as we had Seven on the ship." protests Locutus.

"Indeed I did." I reply, "But we need Seven to complete a mission in the Delta Quadrant soon, so we wish to have her back. Your usefulness has ended, so we will now assimilate you. Thank you for looking after her, by the way."

"Can't we come to some sort of negotiation?" Locutus asks, "If we give you Seven, you could let us go as a favour."

I consider this, but the bad mood I was in outweighs everything.

"Sorry, Locutus." I say, "The Assimilation Chamber is all ready. Look on the bright side, you will be made my deputy, rather than a common drone. Quite an honour."

The Captain starts to protest, and looks to the Klingon to discuss tactics. As he does, a giant noise is heard. It rocks both the Cube and starship.

What is going on?

Part of space nearby has been ripped open. Borg sensors reveal nothing previously encountered. It is a rift into poisonous fluidic space where no life can exist.

A strong gravity pull is drawing both ships towards it. Our engines cannot prevent the pull. Unless we can stop it, both the Enterprise and Unimatrix 01 will be destroyed when it enters the dimensional rift.

I knew this would be a bad day when I didn't have my cornflakes.

To be continued...

19 comments:

Erifia Apoc said...

My breatheren are coming! Watch out Queenie...

(I'm 1/16 Specie 8472)

Anonymous said...

I think this was a week for us females to be in bad moods!

A Army Of (Cl)One said...

"a rift into poisonous fluidic space ... A strong gravity pull"


Well that sucks!


(see it was a little play on the grabity pulling thingy .... nevermind)

Word Vert was: gasfre --- just sounds bad

Linda said...

Riker dropped a donut??? He dropped a donut??? Now that's just not right - Borg or no Borg!

Oh, and the poisonous fluidic space stuff sucks, too!

Empress Bee (of the high sea) said...

donut? did someone say donut?

smiles, bee

Tawnya Shields said...

Does Borg have hormones?
Inquiring minds want know!

Anonymous said...

Borgs...they are such social charmers, aren't they?

Gyrobo said...

Species 8472 is after donuts?

What?

Kønig Hasemörder said...

Stanly Kubrick conveys a hive message to me. He is upset that there was a giant noise in a vacuum. He assimilates my erasure head.

merlyn said...

oh my.

I guess it would have been even worse if the cornflakes were soggy.

Anonymous said...

I wonder what Borg Queen thinks of Britney.

Jaime said...

Uh-oh. It can't be good when Riker drops his donut.

Better program cornflakes into the replicators, Captain. This might be the end.

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Ellee, I think Britney might be too unstable for the Borg.

Merlyn, the Borg Queen certainly would not want her cornflakes soggy.

Titania, I think the Queen has a few hormones.

Tak & Linda, I agree..poisonous fluidic space sucks.

Justice said...

wow poison ... do you know the number for galactic poison control?

pads said...

Its nice to know that even the borg queen can have a bad day just like the rest of us. Perhaps she is only human after all.

Love pads

The Mistress of the Dark said...

Further proof that the wrong breakfast can ruin a whole day for many people

Unknown said...

Maybe the ships will knock each other out, like billiard balls knocking into each other.

Seven of Nine kept looking better the less Borg-ized she was.

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

ANd if you get sucked into poisonous fluidic space, how do you get out? I don't think that either phasers or diplomacy would work.

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