Sunday, August 30, 2009

Trouble On Wondawowman (Part Six)



Guest Poster: Wesley Crusher

Now that my honeybunch wife Karena, her sister Nexa, their mother Queen Diana, Juliana, our Captain Hernandez and Commander Hathaway and I have all broken out of prison, we are racing to stop the amazon Yalana from taking Queen Diana's throne.

---------

"Where are they right now, honeybunch?" I ask Karena as I shake the dust off my outfit. It will take forever to clean it.

"There is only one place, pumpkin." she replioes, "That is the Oracle of Wisdom, where all important events take place. We were married there."

As we go towards there, Nexa talks to her sister.



"Please forgive me, sister." says the raven-haired woman to blonde Karena, "I was taken in by the words of Yalana, Yorga and Felicia. Though we have always had our differences, for once we shall fight side by side in honour of our mother."

"For once, we shall indeed." Karena answers, "Though we shall always be very different."

---------

We all approach the Oracle of Wisdom, and see all the amazons assembled. They are all booing the stage, as if a villainous wrester has just entered the ring. Yalana is standing there, flanked by Yorga and Felicia.



"Fellow amazons." she announces, "As Queen Diana and her daughter have deserted you, I have put myself forward and declare myself the Quee...."

Queen Diana strides on to the stage and kicks Yalana down on the floor with her boot. I think this is going to get ugly..I think I'll look the other way....

Nexa and Juliana rush forward to overpower Yorga, the huge amazon, while Karena takes on Felicia, giving her a massive thump and pinning her to the stage floor with her spear.

"You never thought you could beat me, did you, Felicia?" she laughs, "This attempted coup is over!"

Queen Diana pulls Yalana up, and grips her tightly. The amazons all assembled give a loud cheer.

"My amazons." The Queen announces, "I and my daughter were held under guard by this usurper who tried to wrest my throne from me. These three women will suffer the ultimate amazonian penalty of having their spears broken in two and exiled from Wondawowman forever."

Further cheers erupt. I think everything is looking good again. The Queen turns to us.

"Thank you for supporting me in my hour of need ." she tells us, "Nexa, you only just missed being exiled yourself. Be careful of your action. Dearest daughter Karena and Life Servant Wesley, you saved us, as did you, Juliana, Captain Hernandez and Commander Hathaway."

Time to beam up to the USS Rhode Island. Why is the dust of this planet so hard to get off my uniform?

-------------

Editors Note:





Mimi of The Queen's Meme has sent this in....


The Queen's Tuesday Meme #8 ~ The Bloggingham Love Shack
Warning: Hide the children!
There are love shenanigans in the dungeon.


Welcome to The Queen's Meme #8.
Step out of the box. Be creative. Have fun!
And please, stay out of the dungeon.

I've tried to avoid this subject. It is the fickle fodder of many a meme these days. Romance, s*x, relationships and breakups are really nobody's business. Wouldn't you say? Or perhaps it's the questions that are too personal and a bit juvenile at times. Middle school smooching is not exactly the end all and be all of civilization. (Is it? I don't know. I seem to have forgotten.) To tell you the truth, I'm getting just a little sick of all the love shenanigans going on in the dungeon down below. I can hear you. You are all just a wee bit too happy if you ask me. If I didn't know better I'd swear you want to stay!
But seriously, we could all use a little lot of romance in our lives. I promise not to ask questions that would make your mother blush. I suggest you tell her not to read your blog tomorrow.


Bloggingham Love Shack (aka The Romance Meme)

1. What is the craziest thing you've ever done in the name of love?

Said "I'll right I'll go out with you."

2. How much mystery should there be in a relationship? Is it a good thing or not?

It depends what the mystery is. Is it a whodunnit? Is it a horror story?


3. Is there someone in the blogosphere you'd like to get to know more intimately? Have you been too shy to ask? Let me help you. Write a 3 sentence anonymous love letter to them in this meme.
Leave a link if you dare. (I promise not to tell!)
"Dear Blogger, I've been meaning to tell you for the longest time that I really dig your blog, baby. I know you like mine as well. So how about it, sweetie?"etc etc"

Or if you wish, do some matchmaking instead. "Dear Blogger #1 and Blogger #2, I think you would be perfect for each other. This is why..."

4. Describe a "perfect evening" with the one you love.

Sweet music, good food, soft lights and.......shall we leave it at that?

5. If you are in a relationship, describe the one thing that makes it work well for you. If you are not in a relationship, do you want to be? If so, what type of romance are you looking for? What would it look like in your life?

I'm looking for a woman with her own castle? Any suggestions?

6. If you had to choose between having good s*x (I told you not to let your mother read this) OR intelligent conversation on a regular basis, which would you choose and why?


Can't we have a good intelligent conversation DURING???


and finally.....a purely selfish question:

7. I've got the Bloggingham Blues. What type of man is right for Queen Mimi Pencil Skirt? Do any of you see love in her foreseeable future? What do you suggest I do to spice up my love life? What am I doing wrong????!

I think you shouldn't handcuff them to the wall as soon as you see someone. That is a bad start in any relationship. Let them say "Hello" before you do that.

62 comments:

Fly Girl said...

Now that's what I like to see! Nothing like Amazon action to start my Sunday off right!

The Curmudgeon said...

They were booing her to begin with?

She might have known that this was not the best way to start a new regime....

Michael Manning said...

Although I sound a bit distracted by these beautiful women from time to time, I can assure you that I really am keeping up with the details of this incredible series of events, Captain. But if the Oracle of Wisdom is the blond in the white dress, as Shakespeare would surely say: PLay on!:)

The Mistress of the Dark said...

Wow still trouble here?

LADYHIGHTOWER said...

Thank you for noticing, Picard. That, indeed, is my middle name! Thou would not desire any soul to have to sicken by wondering, would thou? Please tell Sir Crusher he hast now begun his learning in the meme game. Would that thou suggest he participate under his own pen ere non. I am confident our Queen shall welcome him with open arms and toast his brilliant substitution for ye, Picard, in her precious game! Now perk up, my dandy Captain! Clear thine eyes and paste on your silly grin for yon serving wench approacheth. She's welcome to ye, sotted sprout!

mielikki said...

No handcuff's on the first date?
Oh, okay
nice one...

Mimi Lenox said...

Laughinhg at mielikki....

I see you are still angry with me for throwing you in the dungeon last week. But I didn't handcuff you to the wall, I swear! It must have been someone else (who shall remain nameless)

You are such a mystery, my friend!
And always delightful.
Who is Sir Crusher? I am so out of the loop!!

Finding Pam said...

I knew you were single from your description of the perfect date.

Looking for a woman with a castle? How about our Queen? Do you want me to fix you up? Ha! Ha!

Great answers.

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Sorry Mimi...accidentally wrote the post under Wes' names. You know so many guests can write.

Pam...I think there might be a fight between Mimi and Lady Hightower over me.

LADYHIGHTOWER said...

Captain, sir! In no way wouldst I compare mine own countenance to the Queen! Her majesty, by far, is the fairest in the land. There t'would be no fighting over thee. I am but a LADY-BORN. She is the Queen! Are ye interested only in a fight? Thy manhood would not suffer if thou were lucky enough to win the hand of either one of us!

Mimi Lenox said...

Sigh.

I'm a peace lovin' Queen. Don't ya know that by now?

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Well it's all resolved at least I wonder where they are going to be exiled to....

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