Today, we're having a meeting about how to boost the flagging morale of the crew.
"They need to be told to be efficient!" says Worf.
"That doesn't achieve the objective, Mr Worf." I say, "The crew will work a lot better when they are happy."
"Then they need to be ordered to be happy." he replies.
"I think they need some entertainment." suggests Deanna.
"That's an excellent idea; what do you suggest?"
"Er...I'm not sure, Captain."
"What about The Dregs?" says Geordi.
"Who are they?" I reply.
"The newest international rock band in the Federation. They play heavy metal at 200 decibels."
"We want to entertain the crew, Mr La Forge, not turn them all stone deaf."
"How about Christina Spears, the teen pop sensation?" asks Beverly.
"Is she the 19 year old singer who has married 4 times?"
"Yes, she's very popular."
"I don't think that's possible." Data says, "As she is on tour in a distant part of the galaxy?"
"Can we not do a holographic concert by her."
"It's hardly the same thing, Captain. The crew will want the real thing." Deanna tells me.
"What about a Talent Night?" suggests Riker.
"What do you mean, Number One?"
"Well, the senior staff could all come and entertain the crew with their various skills. I'm sure it would be highly entertaining."
All of the others agree enthusiastically. I can see a problem here.
"Err, surely the Captain wouldn't need to take part, would he?" I ask.
"But you'd have to," says Deanna, "It would be the highpoint of the show."
I reluctantly agree to the show; it looks like I've got to find a talent.